You can see that this private dump offers a weekend program, whereby one can earn a law degree by attending classes on Saturdays and Sundays. Nothing says world class institution like a weekend law program, right?! And look, the school has FOUR campuses throughout the State of Michigan. Oh joy! The main pile is located in Lansing, with waste sites in Grand Rapids, Auburn Hills, and a new campus in Ann Arbor. (It’s akin to having four rolls of toilet paper to wipe your ass with!)
Look at TTTTs helping each other out – TTTThoma$ Cooley took over the space that housed Ave Marie Toilet of Law, i.e. Domino’s Pizza School of Law. I’m sure my friend, Jack Crittenden, thinks that this is a great development in “legal education.”
Tuition: Via Cooley’s supposed “Facts-At-A-Glance,” we see that tuition for full-time students will come out to $28,740 - for the 2009-2010 school year.
Estimated Educational Expenses: For the 2009-2010 academic year, the toilet estimates that a student will spend $13,800 in books, room & board, transportation and personal expenses. This would bring the total COA – for a FT student - to a suspiciously low $42,540.
And look, you can start your “legal studies” in January, May or September! What more could you ask for?!?!
Total Enrollment: According to this “fact sheet,” the school has a total enrollment of 3,783 students. Of this amount, 84 percent are part-time students! So, that means that only about 605 students – out of this figure – are enrolled full-time.
Average Starting Salary: The school lists this figure as $52,400. There are no charts, pie graphs, or further breakdown. That is about par for the course, when it comes to self-reported information.
Ranking: According to US News & World Report, this school is a fourth tier trash can.
Ethics: This school has the temerity to feature a page on Ethics and Integrity. Yes, apparently, pumping out a ton of JDs every year into an over-saturated legal market is ethical. Especially, when this is done by a well-known diploma mill that realizes MOST of its grads will not have a shot in hell of practicing law! You are also producing a ton of minority lawyers who will be up to their eyeballs in non-dischargeable debt – with no chance of ever paying this off. Yes, good for you Thomas Cooley. You are the embodiment of integrity, right?!?! Oh well, at least you can crow about having the most “diverse” student body of any diploma mill in the country.
Other Considerations: The school is ranked 12th by its own law school rankings scheme!
Well, at least the school is seeking to attract more students via advertising. Apparently, a total enrollment of 3783 students is not a large enough pool of victims for this school to claim. They have decided to spend $1.485 million, over 11 years, on the naming rights to a minor league baseball park. (Maybe that will help move Cooley up in US&NWR’s rankings. It should at least help the school climb the ladder in its own rankings scheme.)
In the last analysis, this school is a complete and total festering pile of excrement. Do not piss away (borrowed) money to attain a “legal education” at this dump. I don’t care if you get a scholarship that covers tuition plus living expenses. Where will you hang your law degree? I would rather admit getting my JD from Wal-Mart (with the purchase of a set of paint brushes) than tell anyone I went to this TTTToileTTTT!