Ranking: According to US News & World Report, this school is ranked as the 86th most amazing, astounding, exhilarating, breath-taking law school in the land! Yay! Their mothers must be so proud. Then again, the school shares this presTTigious honor with six other diploma mills.
Employment and Starting Salary Statistics: According to the school’s Office of Professional Deception, I meant to say “Professional Development,” 91 percent of its JDs from December 2009, May 2010 and August 2010 was employed within nine months of graduation. Sure they were, and actress Lauren Graham just locked her ankles around my waist and bit the hell out of my left shoulder – right after I gave her ten tremendous, spine-tingling, mind-numbing orgasms in a row!! Guess what, OPD drones?! NINE MONTHS HAVE NOT PASSED SINCE MAY OR AUGUST 2010!
The toilet of law goes on to claim that the median law firm starting salary for this recent class is $82,500. For Business, this figure is $55,800; Government $44,500, Judicial Clerks make $50,000; Public Interest $46,000; and Academic is listed as $51,500.
Furthermore, this document lists the median starting salary as $75K for those who leave the state; $72K for grads working in Indianapolis; and $60K for those JDs who stay in Indiana but work outside of Indianapolis. You may want to take these figures with a grain of salt, as the school does not list how many people responded to the salary info.
Average Recent JD Indebtedness: According to USN&WR, the average indebtedness of this commode’s 2009 graduates who incurred law school debt was $80,718. And 87 percent of this graduating class incurred law school debt.
Faculty and Administrator Salary Info: According to the Indianapolis Star, for 2008, dean and “Gerald L. Bepko Professor of Law”, Gary R. Roberts made $271,691 – making him the sixth-highest paid public university employee at this branch of Indiana University.
If you go into the database further and look up incomes in the $100K-$250K range, you can also see the following salaries for 2008: Paul N. Cox, “vice dean and Centennial Professor of Law” – whatever the hell that is – “earned” $186,330; Norman Lefstein, “Professor of Law and Dean Emeritus” made $176,497; and Judith Ford Anspach, “Professor of Law and Director of the Ruth Lilly Law Library” made $172,415.
What’s that you say?! You will make yourself stand out in this cluttered job market by earning good grades and landing on law review?! Well, for some reason, most legal employers – and pretty much ALL non-legal employers – do not give a damn if you were Notes Editor of the European Journal of Law Reform. Who knows? It may have something to do with the fact that Indianapolis is roughly 4,000 miles from the westernmost part of Europe. Likewise, potential employers do not care about your experience writing for the Indiana International & Comparative Law Review. Honestly, how does your esoteric, tangential understanding of international affairs benefit a toiletlaw firm?!
Conclusion: Indiana Univer$iTTy $ewer of Law-Indianapoli$ is a middling, trifling institution that will NOT provide the bulk of its students and graduates with strong job prospects. Unless, of course, you consider the following jobs appealing for a recent JD or lawyer with an additional $80K-$120K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt: insurance adjuster for Allstate; bouncer at Club Paradise; night manager at Denny’s; or as a customer service representative at TeleServe in Indianapolis.
If you are considering this commode of law, you need to ask yourself whether it is smart to invest three years of your life and $100K of NON-DISCHARGEABLE student loans for a realistic chance to earn $40K upon graduation. Lastly, check out the bi-modal salary distribution of recent lawyers and JDs, from the Class of 2009, put out by our friends over at NALP.
In fact, the mean, adjusted mean and average figures do not tell us much, as 34% of those who reported their income made between $40K and $65K. And 25% or 4,878.25 graduates reported incomes of $160,000 or more. So, if you do not land Biglaw – and there is not much chance of that happening from this dirty toilet – you are looking at making $35K-$45K, NOT $60K or $72K.