Friday, February 25, 2011

Profiles in Testicular Atrophy: Bob Morse, Director of Data Research at US News & World Report

“Last Sunday, the NY Times asked: Are law schools deceiving prospective students into incurring huge debt for degrees that aren’t worth it?

Of course they are. The U.S. News is an aider and abettor. As the market for new lawyers shrinks, a key statistic in compiling the publication’s infamous rankings is “graduates known to be employed nine months after graduation. Any job qualifies - from joining Cravath to waiting tables.”
[Emphasis mine]

Bob Morse cannot be bothered with such details.

Speaking through his labia, Robert Morse states:

“Despite some notable exceptions and data errors over the years, it turns out the schools are pretty reliable in their data reporting.”

Yes, a “law professor” at Chapman University was able to reach the same results using the magazine’s methodology. That MUST mean that the schools are furnishing accurate info, right?!?! However, Morse concludes his article with this telling admission:

“Finally, does Bell's study also prove that law schools are being accurate in how they report their statistical profile data to the ABA, the general public, and U.S. News? No, this only proves that law schools are being very careful to report the same data to U.S. News that they report to the ABA for accrediting purposes.” [Emphasis mine]

Knowing that the commodes of law are merely reporting the same info to your publicaTTTion, the ABA and NALP, why did you entitle the piece, “Law Schools Report Accurate Data to US News”?!?! Consistency does not equal accuracy, Bob.

See for yourselves how honest and accurate these law school have been with USN&WR:

“North Dakota was not the only surprise on the U.S. News list of top [Article III] judicial clerkship feeder law schools. The University of Wyoming was No. 5 and the University of St. Thomas at No. 6. All are tier 3 law schools on U.S. News’ overall list.”

“In order to include Villanova in the upcoming graduate school rankings, U.S. News asked Villanova’s [John] Gotunda to certify the accuracy of the accuracy of its fall 2010 admissions data in a letter. Here is a copy of that February 10, 2011 letter to U.S. News certifying the accuracy of Villanova‘s 2010 admissions data. U.S. News will rank Villanova in our upcoming rankings and link its name to this letter so that the public has some understanding of what Villanova did and how the school plans to report accurately going forward.”

Yes, a self-interested law school dean informed the publication that the previous administration had KNOWINGLY provided inaccurate info to US News. Then, the same dean submitted a letter “certifying” the accuracy of its admissions data. That’s good enough for Bob. You are one gullible fool, Morse. Actually, the term willfully ignorant is more accurate. Let’s ask the bank robber to send us a letter certifying that the money in the big sack belongs to him.

As you can see, US News no longer labels schools as third or fourth tier. Hence, any school ranked lower than 100 will be listed as “unranked.” Apparently, Bob Morse and his fellow eunuchs no longer wanted to offend fourth tier trash cans. That’s okay. I have a hard copy of the 2010 rankings. I will continue to rely on this, when profiling TTTs and TTTTs.

USN&WR will allegedly consider assigning a number to third tier law schools, in it next issue. After trimming his bush, Robert Morse said, “We do have ranking scores for all law schools, but editorially we didn’t want to say ’This is the 188th law school [representing last place].’” If you gave one damn about prospective law students, then you would provide a numerical rating next to each diploma mill.

Lastly, USN&WR no longer lists average law student indebtedness, by school. I understand that US News decided to remodel its website. However, for $ome rea$on, these accomplices to the law school cartel are unable or unwilling to re-enter the debt figures into a database. Check out their response to my email, from 11 days ago.

“From: U.S. News Webmaster
Subject: RE: Reader Feedback: Letter to the Editor
To: "''"
Date: Monday, February 14, 2011, 3:36 PM

I apologize for the inconvenience. Due to the website redesign some links got lost. U.S. News is in the process of restoring these links and plan to have this back up sometime this week.


Conclusion: Robert Morse and his dried-up ovaries are not about to ruin a good thing, for the magazine and the ABA. He does not care that THOUSANDS of JDs cannot find legal employment. He will not be bothered by the fact that many will be consigned to a lifetime of debt servitude. In the end, he simply wants to sell more TTT magazine subscriptions.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Rank, Fourth Tier Scat Pile: Whittier Law School

Tuition: On page 6 of this dense document, we see that current tuition and fees at Whittier Law - for a full-time student - amount to $38,000. However, a part-time student will only be charged $23,350 for the 2010-2011 school year. And who doesn’t have that amount sitting in the bank?!

Total Cost of Attendance: On the same page, the school lists the total estimated COA - for a full-time student - as $61,230. The commode notes the following: “For the purpose of aid verification, the COA is normally based on a nine-month period for fall and spring semesters only (the summer term is not included).”

As those of us in the real world are aware, an actual student will need to pay living expenses for twelve months out of the year. Therefore, room and board, personal expenses, and transportation will be an additional $6,880. This would provide us with a more accurate COA figure of $68,110 - for one year at a California truck stop restroom!!

Ranking: What’s that you say, Lemming? “Where is this school ranked?” Well, I am glad you asked. According to US News & World Report, this school is a fourth tier, sweltering dung pile.

WHITTIER LAW SCHOOL WAS RECENTLY ON PROBATION: The school was on probation for several years, due to its graduates’ low bar passage rate. Of course, the school took some measures to increase these results. The ABA has placed the school in good standing. The cockroaches at Whittier have since removed all links that mentioned the school’s probationary status.

Supposed Employment Placement Statistics: The sewer claims that 89.3% of its Class of 2009 was employed or enrolled in degree programs, presumably within nine months of graduation. However, one quickly realizes that 83.3% of this class was employed.

Head over to page 2. Of those in “private practice,” 10.3 percent went into solo practice, while 73.1 percent entered into firms of 2-10 lawyers. Yes, the sign of a true “legal education” powerhouse, right?!?!

Starting Salary Info: On page 3 of this PDF, you can see that only 47 respondents provided salary info! On page 1, the school notes that 150 out of 151 graduates provided employment status. Of these, 125 JDs reported being employed. And yet only 37.6% of these grads reported salary data?!?! Based on these relative, pathetic few responses, the commode lists 25th percentile starting salary for private practice at $60K, whereas the 75th percentile is listed as $74,500.

Law Student Indebtedness: The bitches and hobos at US News are still unable to bring this page back up. One would think that some staff member of this rag would be able to re-enter the figures from a database. Apparently, that is too ambitious and work-intensive.

In 2005-2006, the trash can apparently awarded full tuition and stipend to 4.8% of students; full-tuition scholarships to 3.4% of its students; and half-tuition scholarships to 10.7% of the class. How many of these recipients kept their scholarships after first year?! By the way, Law School Numbers shows that one California law firm participated in the school’s 2007-2008 OCI program!

“Professor” and Administrator Salaries: Head over to page 30 of Whittier College’s 2009 Tax Form 990. There, you will see that Dean Neil Cogan made $340,454 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for 2008. Yes, Cogan received $233,310 in base compensation; $30,000 in “other” compensation, and $77,144 in nontaxable benefits. But that’s not all!

Take a look at these 2008 TOTAL COMPENSATION figures, for the following “law professors”: William Patton, $258,607; Howard Foss, $227,755; David Welkowitz, $198,291; and “associate professor” Calvin Peeler, $228,839. Who says “higher education” doesn’t pay off?! Actually it does not pay off for most of the students, but the casino system pays out tremendously for the “professors.”

Conclusion: Whittier Law School is an embarrassment to “higher education.” It was recently on probation from the free-wheeling ABA. That is akin to being turned down by a busted-up, snaggletooth, broke-ass prostitute. The fact that this filthy pile of excrement is allowed to operate is a clear sign that the system is broken, in that it does not serve the interests of students or the public. Law school is designed to provide cushy jobs to academics, most of whom could not hack it in the real world.

Ask yourself the following: “Do I want to take out $174K to earn a TTTT law degree, and enter a dwindling industry?” If the answer is no, then walk away from this turd pile. You do not need to take on such monstrous levels of NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, in order to land a job making $35K-$45K. Would you pay $30K for a 1996 Nissan Sentra with 213,000 miles on it? Would you pay $4,000 for a ten-year-old laptop? Of course not! Again, the choice is clear: if this is the best school you can get into, then you need to return to your $35K job and get those notions of being a lawyer/justice seeker out of your head.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Fourth Tier Pile of Industrial Waste: Willamette University College of Law

Tuition: For the 2010-2011 school year, a full-time student at Willamette Law will pay $31,050 in tuition. Books and the SBA fee bring school-related costs to $32,590. Remember, this is an “investment” in oneself - and (supposedly) will make one more “marketable.”

Total Cost of Attendance: The commodes estimates that living expenses, i.e. medical, transportation, insurance, room and board, will amount to $14,510 for the nine-month academic year. This would bring the estimated COA to $47,100 for the 2010-2011 academic year.

Seeing that actual law students will have living expenses for twelve months, and not nine months, we will determine a more accurate number. The lazy hags at Willamette did not provide a breakdown of costs, so twelve month living expenses will total $19,347. This would bring the more-accurate, estimated total COA to $50,397.

Ranking: This school is pricey, but its sterling reputation will excuse the high cost of admission, right?!?! Well, according to US News & World Report, Willamette University School of Law is a decrepit fourth tier piece of trash. But at least it is located in lovely Salem, Oregon. Take some solace in that fact.

Supposed Employment Placement Rate and Salary Info: According to “Career Services,” 95 percent of the Class of 2009 secured employment within nine months of graduation. This pertains to those JDs known to be seeking employment. I suppose those from wealthy families or those who have given up hope could not be considered, in this calculation.

The school also maintains that 49% of this class - or at least those known to be looking for work - landed in private practice. The published salary range is $33,000-$110,000 - with a median salary of $60K.

Law School Indebtedness: According to the Webmaster at US News, “Due to the website redesign some links got lost. U.S. News is in the process of restoring these links and plan to have this back up sometime this week.” Just in case they cannot restore the link or do not re-post the figures, I will look for my hard copy.

Faculty and Administrator Pay: Let’s see how well the professoriate at this fourth tier waste pile is doing. For this info, we head to page 34 of WillameTTTTe Univer$iTTTTy’s 2009 Form 990.

Dean Symeon Symeonides “earned” $321,784 in TOTAL COMPENSATION - for 2008. Next, we see that “Roderick and Carol Wendt Chair in Business Law and Director of the Law and Business Program” Peter V. Letsou made $245,916 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for the same school year - while “professor of law” Kathy Graham raked in a mere $232,742.

The school offered full-tuition scholarships to 0.0% of its students, for the 2005-2006 academic year. Furthermore, only 10.6% received half-tuition scholarships. It will be interesting to see the law school indebtedness for this school’s recent grads - if USN&WR can be bothered to retrieve this info and publish the chart.

On page 13, you can see that the commode had the 7th best Dispute Resolution program - in 2006! This may come in handy, when - as a WillameTTTTe JD - you are negotiating with your landlord to give you another week to come up with rent, and request that he lower the late fees.

Look at these embarrassing garbage programs. You can earn a certificate in "Sustainability Law" or in "International and Comparative Law." That will surely set you apart from the legions of other job applicants, right?!?!

However, if you truly want to distinguish yourself as an elite student, make sure that you write onto the prestigious Willamette Sports Law Journal.

If you prefer that people line up to buy your drinks, laugh at your jokes, and that beautiful woman faint when you enter a room, become a student editor at the Willamette Journal of International Law and Dispute Resolution.

Conclusion: This school is a true diploma mill. Going back to the employment figures, apparently no one from the Class of 2009 landed Biglaw. The school’s cost almost requires that one earn large sums of money - simply to make a positive return on investment. You do not need to incur an additional $100K-$130K of NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt to land a job making $35K-$55K. As hard as it is to believe, some young workers who exhibit initiative and a strong work product are making such sums, without a law degree!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Flush This Second Tier Turd a Second Time: Villanova University School of Law

After leveling this dump last year, I was content to leave this pile of rubbish alone. In fact, in my first post, I did not mention that then-dean Mark Sargent resigned, after he was caught frequenting prostitutes. After all, he is only a man – and prostitutes can present such a problem to one’s defenses.

Here is the link to the entry, where I flushed this commode back on February 20, 2010. However, this was before I had accessed Guidestar, Law School Numbers, and USN&WR’s list of average law student indebtedness.

However, the new dean at this second tier sewage pit recently admitted that the school KNOWINGLY reported inaccurate info to the ABA. I simply could not let this travesty pass. Upon seeing this story, I had to inform Lauren Graham that she would not be climbing on top of me, and digging her nails into my torso, later on – as something more important came up.

Tuition: According to this supposed “Fact Sheet,” a full-time law student at Vanillanova will be charged $36,690 for the 2010-2011 school year. Last year, this figure amounted to $34,860. This represents an increase of 5.25%, in one year.

Employment and Salary Stats: From the same page, we can see that the school asserts that 93% of its 2009 graduating class was employed within nine months of graduation. Yeah - and Salma Hayek reported being unable to walk straight the next day 93% of the time, after spending the night with me.

Ranking: Apparently, lying and cheating did not pay off for this dump last year. As you can see, the school went from 61st most amazing, exhilarating and breathtaking to merely the 67th best law school in the land. That is according to a publication called US News & World Report. Evidently, increases in tuition are not tied to performance. After all, this second tier waste facility dropped six spots in the USN&WR rankings - but saw an increase in tuition of 5.25 percent.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: According to US News, the average student indebtedness – for those members of Villanova Law’s Class of 2009 who incurred law school debt – was $116,878. But don’t worry; only 89 percent of this particular graduating class took on such NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt. I wouldn’t want any OVERPAID faculty members to lose any sleep, over this level of student debt.

Faculty and Administrator Pay: We will go to page 45 of Vanillanova Univer$iTTy’s 2009 Form 990, to see how well the “professors” are doing, in comparison to their debt-soaked students. Doing so, we realize that former dean and prostitution customer Mark Sargent made $330,744 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for 2008. I suppose one can purchase/rent many prostitutes on that salary.

John F. Murphy, “professor of law” made $264,422 in TOTAL COMPENSATION for the same tax year. Richard Booth, “Martin G. McGuinn Chair in Business Law professor of law” raked in $246,664 in TOTAL COMPENSATION. See where your large sums of borrowed money go?!?!

On page 46 of the school’s tax form, take a look at the organization’s mi$$ion:

“Villanova University is a Catholic Augustinian community of higher education, committed to excellence and distinction in the discovery, dissemination and application of knowledge. Inspired by the life and teaching of Jesus Christ, the university is grounded in the wisdom of the Catholic intellectual tradition and advances a deeper understanding of the relationship between faith and reason.”

[Did you vomit yet?!]

“Through [Villanova spokesman Jonathan] Gust, the university provided the following written statement to the ABA Journal:

"Villanova University has learned that inaccurate admissions data was knowingly reported to the American Bar Association (ABA) by individuals at the Villanova Law School (VLS) for years prior to 2010.”
[Emphasis mine]

Conclusion: What’s that you say, Lemming?!?! Why would the school KNOWINGLY and INTENTIONALLY lie to the ABA, you ask?! You may as well ask, “Why would any person or institution fudge numbers?” Because there is something to gain by lying!!

In the final analysis, this school is an overpriced sewer pit. The school offers courses in “Ethics and Professional Responsibility.” These concepts are beaten into the students’ minds, by overpaid, under-worked “law professors.” The sewer of law charges its students $36,690 for one year, in tuition and fees - and yet DELIBERATELY provided inaccurate/false information to the ABA. That tells you all you need to know about the ethics of this Catholic, Augustinian, non-profit “institution of higher learning“!!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Decrepit, Fourth Tier Waste Pile: Oklahoma City University School of Law

Before I jump into the subject matter, I would like to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the birth of this foul, pile of excrement. Who else could have TRIPLED the accumulated, national debt of this country in eight, short years?!

“Eureka College failed the Education Department's financial-responsibility test in the years 2007-09.”

How fitting is it that Moron’s alma mater failed the Department of Education’s financial responsibility test, for several years?

Tuition: For the 2010-2011 school year, a full-time student at the sewer will be charged $33,221.50 in tuition. Part-time students will only be charged $23,065.

Ranking: The school is located in Oklahoma City. That’s the good news. For some reason, US News & World Report has listed this school down as a fourth tier, sweltering dung heap.

Employment Statistics: Since this fourth tier pile of waste did not supply employment placement info, we go to another source. Law School Numbers shows that the 83.9% of the commode’s Class of 2005 was employed within nine months of graduation.

The school does not mention what percentage of its grads ended up serving appetizers at McFinn’s Pub, or how many graduates are checking IDs at the door of The Eight Ball. Furthermore, the sewer of law did not state how many OCU JDs are selling Allstate insurance policies, or installing cabinets and tabletops at Home Depot.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: USN&WR lists the average student debt - for those OCU Law 2009 grads who incurred law school debt – as $102,125. The magazine also notes that 85% of this wretched graduating class took on such debt, to attend this dung pile.

Faculty and Administrator Pay: Head over to page 26 of Oklahoma City University’s 2009 Form 990, to take a look at how well OCU “law professors” are doing. We can see that dean Lawrence Hellman made $250,881 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for 2008. Yes, Hellman made $213,731 in base compensation, plus $37,150 in nontaxable benefits. But that’s not all!

You see, associate dean for academic affairs Eric Laity “earned” $197,885 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for the same tax year. Then again, he is a member of the International Fiscal Association and the American Society for International Law. Arthur G. LeFrancois made $186,853 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, while teaching criminal law, criminal procedure and jurisprudence. Lastly, Dennis W. Arrow, “professor of law” and associate director of the Native American Legal Resource Center, made $164,510 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for 2008. Now, we can see why EVERYONE in the U.S. should seek “higher education.”

But who cares about that, right?! After all, this commode is committed to diversity!!

Here is an apt answer to that age old question: Which law school is better? OCU in Oklahoma City or California Western in San Diego?

“Don't do it! Don't go to law school!!! It sucks, it is expensive, and, unless you like reading material 24/7 that is so indecipherable that you need other books just to help you understand what you are reading (i.e. your textbooks), having only one test determine your entire grade in any given course, and going to school with cocky d*cks, don't go. And most lawyers don't make very much money, contrary to popular belief, unless they work in some big firm in a cubicle (spending upwards of 80 or 90 hours at the office per week). I am telling you, find another profession!!!!!!”

Conclusion: This school is a fourth tier stink pit that overcharges its students. News flash: you do not need to take on an additional $110K-$150K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, in order to find a damn job. Most students will not benefit from obtaining a law degree from a FOURTH TIER TRASH PIT, such as this one. Legal employers care about a school’s ranking. If you attend a fourth tier dump, you need to land in the top 2-5 students in the class to have a shot at decent legal employment.

If you want, you can send me a check for $10K and I will be happy to kick you square in the gonads. It will not be nearly as painful as being an unemployed, broke-ass lawyer, who lives in his mother‘s garage. Plus this amount represents a mere fraction of the cost of law school, and you will not need to piss away three years of your life.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Third Tier Filth Pile: University of Tulsa College of Law

Tuition: A full-time student at this law school will be charged $30,320 in tuition, for the 2010-2011 school year. Student fees add up to another $174.

Overall Cost of Attendance: The commode estimates that room & board for a student living on-campus will come up to $9,118; for those living off-campus, this figure is listed as $12,642. Books will add another $1,500 to the tab. Without taking insurance, transportation or parking into account, a full-time student - who lives off campus - at this dump is looking at $44,636 in expenses.

Ranking: So the school is located in the cosmopolitan metropolis of Tulsa, OK. Plus, annual tuition eclipses $30K. Surely, this “institution of higher learning” can justify the cost, right?!?! Well, not exactly. You see, US News & World Report lists this school as a member of the third tier cesspool, with other solid denizens such as Willamette University, University of Toledo and the University of Baltimore.

“The University of Tulsa has the 123rd best law school in the nation, which might not sound like much, but it's a damned sight better than being No. 147, and legitimate reason for celebration on 11th Street.”

To get an idea of how filthy this commode is, take a look at this article. The reporter is thrilled that the school is now the 123rd best law school in the land. Guess what, Wayne?! The school is still a third tier, fourth-rate piece of garbage! Does that temper your exuberance?!

Supposed Employment Placement Rate: The school claims the following: “TU Law's 2009 graduate placement rate of 95.7 percent is a remarkable achievement during a year when the legal profession is particularly hard hit by the economic pressures of the recession.”

Yeah - and Lauren Graham just reported experiencing uncontrollable, multiple orgasms 95.7% of the time that she is with me.

Average Student Indebtedness: US News lists the average student indebtedness - for those members of the Tulsa Law Class of 2009 who incurred law school debt - as $68,642. Fully 70% of this particular, unfortunate class took on such debt.

Administrator Pay: Head over to page 19 of the University of Tulsa’s 2009 IRS Form 990. There, you will see that dean Janet Levit made $201,320 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for 2008. To gain a better insight into the overal higher education scam, go to page 18 take a look at how well university "president" Steadman Upham did that year: this pig made $588,051 in base compensation plus $1,034,178 in "estimated amount of other compensation from the organization and related organizations. Yes, this "educator" made $1,622,229 in TOTAL COMPENSATION - in 2008 - as the "president" of this third tier university.

Look! As a student at this third tier sewage pit, you have the opportunity to write onto the Energy Law Journal and ABA Year in Review!! Yes, you will be the life of the party -from *the moment* you enter the room. Too bad, this valuable experience will not help you land a job.

So many options! You can earn a Public Policy certificate, or a JD/M.A. in Anthropology. Hell, you can even get an M.A. in English, to go with your law degree. Make sure to ask for a side of fries with that. It doesn’t end there; you can also walk away from this moist turd with an M.A. in Industrial Organizational Psychology. (Maybe, you can determine why lemmings insist on attending law school.)

Check this out. Law School Numbers shows that the job placement rate for the Class of 2005, was only 78.5%. Yet, the school now claims an employment rate of 95.7 percent. $omehow, Tulsa was able to increase its nine-month figures by 17.2% while the economy went to hell. Can you say “creative accounting”?!

Furthermore, we can see that the 75th percentile of entering Tulsa students scored a 154 on the LSAT. Those in the 25th percentile had a score of 150. Those in the 75th percentile had a UGPA of 3.53, whereas those in the 25th percentile earned a 2.93 GPA during undergrad. If you have similar numbers, then you may end up at a third tier commode such as this one.

Conclusion: This school is an over-priced filth pit that tosses many of its graduates into the waste bin of society. You will not be well-served to take on $75K-$110K in additional NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt for a law degree from this stench pile.

In the final analysis, this school is a sad joke.
No one gives a damn if this school floated from the fourth tier to the third tier. (Is it a huge accomplishment when a nugget of human waste floats to the surface, after being flushed?!) It is still a decrepit piece of garbage.
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