Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Hold Your Breath: Second Tier Hofstra University School of Law

Tuition: For the 2010-2011 school year, a full-time law student at this institution will be charged $43,034 in tuition. Fees will add another $626 to the tab. Part-time students will only pay $32,275 for tuition, plus $394 in fees.

Total Cost of Attendance: In the worst case scenario, i.e. a full-time student living on his own, the school estimates that the total COA - for the 2010-2011 academic year - will amount to $65,700. Seeing that these commodes only consider room and board, personal expenses and transportation costs for nine months, we will need to provide a more accurate figure. Calculating these expenses over the course of twelve months, we reach an amount of $72,545. Can you guess who is benefiting from this system?! [Hint: it is not the student.]

Ranking: Attending this august institution will set you back severely, financially. However, the school’s amazing reputation will justify the immense cost, right?!?! According to US News & World Report, Hof$TTra Univer$iTTy $chool of Law is the 84th greatest, most fantastic law school in the United States. Yay! The world will be your oyster, as a graduate of this elite, prestigious law school. By the way, this school is miraculously in an eleven-way tie for 84th best law school in the land. What a neat little political ploy, Robert Morse.

Supposed Employment and Salary Statistics: The sewer of law states the following: “Within nine (9) months of graduation, 96.7% of the Class of 2009 had reported their employment status to the Office of Career Services. Of those members of the Class of 2009 who reported their employment status to us, more than 95% were either employed or pursuing a degree on a full-time basis.”

Sure they were - and Jessica Alba just wrapped her legs around my torso, and sunk her teeth into my shoulder and chest.

Further down the page, the school notes that a mere 33% of employed Class of 2009 JDs reported salary information. Maybe the other 67% were too embarrassed to report their big-ass salaries, huh?!?! The toilet asserts that the median private sector starting salary was $90K.

Average Law School Indebtedness: US News shows that the average law student indebtedness, for those members of the Hofstra JD Class of 2010 who incurred law school debt, was $115,705. In case you are interested, 81% of this class took on such debt.

Faculty and Administrator Salaries: In order to see how well the pigs are being fed, we will head over to page 41 of Hofstra University’s 2009 IRS Form 990. Dean and “Professor of Law” Nora Demleitner made $402,719 in TOTAL COMPENSATION - for 2008. Yes, Nora made $201,201 in base compensation; $165,401 in other compensation; $26,710 in deferred compensation; and $9,407 in nontaxable benefits.

We can also see that university president Stuart Rabinowitz made $956,263 off the federal teat, in 2008. This "educator" raked in $505,331 in base compensation; $175,000 in bonus and incentive compensation; $220,700 in other compensation; $35,541 in deferred compensation; and, for good measure, $17,714 in nontaxable benefits. From his university bio:

“Stuart Rabinowitz was chosen by the Hofstra University Board of Trustees to serve as the eighth president of the University on December 20, 2000. Prior to his appointment, he served as dean of Hofstra University School of Law from September 1989 through June 2001. He joined the faculty of the Law School in 1972. President Rabinowitz currently holds the Andrew M. Boas and Mark L. Claster Distinguished Professor of Law.”

“Generosity” of the Law School: According to LSN, Hofstra provided full tuition and stipend to 0.7% of its students - for 2005-2006. The school furnished full tuition scholarships to 4.1 percent of its customers, and half tuition scholarships to 8.4% of its TT students. http://law.hofstra.edu/Academics/Journals/

As a student at this pricey commode, you have the unique privilege to write onto the world-famous Hofstra Labor and Employment Law Journal!! Think of the cruel irony when you graduate without having a job lined up. Somehow, most legal and non-legal employers will not be impressed with this experience. It may come in handy when you are filling out your unemployment forms.

Conclusion: Hofstra University Sewer of Law is a true dung heap. If you attend this overpriced waste pile - and are aiming for Biglaw - keep in mind that you will be competing directly for jobs against students and graduates of the following real law schools: Yale, Harvard, Columbia, NYU, University of Pennsylvania and Cornell. In the legal industry, pedigree matters to potential employers.

By the way, according to the ass-goblins at US News, Car-Bozo comes in at number 50, $eTTon Hall is rated 61st best, and Crooklyn is ranked 67th. Hell, even Rutgers - both branches - are tied with Hofstra Law. You may feel that having a law degree will lead to more income and respect. The reality is that you will likely end up drowning in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, while scrambling to find a job.

Friday, March 25, 2011

Reprehensible Waste Pile: Fourth Tier St. Mary’s University School of Law

Tuition: For the 2010-2011 academic year, a full-time law student at St. Mary’s will be charged $28,800 in tuition – plus $606 in fees. That is one hell of a sum, isn’t it?

Total Cost of Attendance: According to this same page, the school estimates that a full-time $TTTT. Mary’$ Univer$iTTTTy $chool of Law student will have a total COA of $46,566 – for the same school year. However, you can bet your ass the school is only considering the following costs, for the nine-month calendar: housing; board; personal; and transportation.

It seems that actual law students will need to cover such expenses, for twelve months – not nine months. Taking this into account, a more accurate, estimated COA – for 2010-2011 – would be $51,772. Prospective law students need to look at their likely return on investment.


Ranking: The school is pricey, but surely the institution’s sterling reputation will make this a wise choice, right?!?! Well, according to Vagisil Bob Morse and US News & World Report, this school is now listed as “rank not published.” The commode is located in what was – until the evening of March 14, 2011 - referred to as USN&WR’s vaunted fourth tier. Of course, Pussy Boy does not own the term. Congratulations, St. Mary’s University Sewer of Law: your school is a fourth tier pile of waste.


Supposed Employment and Starting Salary Figures: According to Fairy Bob Morse, 85.4% of this commode’s recent JDs were known to be employed at graduation. Yeah, sure they were – and I just struck out Albert Pujols on three straight fast balls. (I suppose many were employed at temp hag agencies, call centers and other non-legal, low-end work. However, this figure still seems highly inflated.) The rag also purports to show that the median private sector starting salary for St. Mary’s law grads was $67,000.


Average Law Student Indebtedness: US News shows that the average student indebtedness – for those members of the St. Mary’s JD Class of 2010 who incurred law school debt – was $97,105. Fully 84% of this poor, unfortunate graduating class took on such toxic debt.


Administrator and “Professor” Salaries: Let’s head over to page 32 of St. Mary University’s 2009 Form 990, to see how well the faculty is doing, in contrast. As you can see, Dean Charles Cantu made $264,049 in TOTAL COMPENSATION – for 2008. Yes, this “educator” made $245,837 in base compensation; $14,831 in deferred compensation; and $3,381 in nontaxable benefits – in one year!

He was not the only pig feeding at the trough. Here is a look at how the following “professors” made out, for the same tax year: Robert W. Platt, $222,088; David A. Schlueter, $203,196; Richard E. Flint, $193,613; and Reynaldo Valencia, $170,459. Apparently, it is very lucrative to “teach” the same old drivel, year after year. What a nice little racket, huh?


Generosity of this Catholic Toilet: LSN shows that the school awarded full tuition plus stipend to 0.3% of its students, for 2005-2006. The sewer provided full tuition scholarships to 1.3% of its students, and half-tuition offers to 1.7%, for the same school year. I suppose this (somehow) falls in line with Jesus of Nazareth’s philosophy, right?!?!


“At St. Mary's University, we combine our tradition of excellence in legal education with new programs and methodologies that prepare our students for the practice of law in a changing world. St. Mary's teaches its students the practical skills that enable them to become professional leaders and effective advocates of legal and social justice.”

This Catholic, Marianist commode wants to produce lawyers who will fight for “social justice.” Isn’t that a laudable goal? In reality, how many can afford to do so - when they are strapped down with mountains of student debt?!?!


Some lemmings had nice things to say about this dump. Back on April 3, 2009, TLS user “brenda” provided some much-needed sobriety to this thread:

“As a former student at St. Mary's Law, I beg everyone considering this school to read this post and take it to heart. I am convinced this is the worst school in the state of Texas. Unless you have a job waiting for you when you graduate (i.e.. your dad or other family member is a lawyer and has promised you a job when you graduate), go somewhere else to law school, or do not go at all.

With the exception of possibly medicine (possibly...), no profession is more snobby about where a person got his degree than law. Do not listen to people who say "just get a law degree from anywhere. The school doesn't matter." Believe me, it matters.
[Emphasis mine]

Conclusion: St. Mary’s University School of Law is an overpriced pile of corroded excrement. You DO NOT NEED to take out an additional $100K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, for a TTTT law degree. Keep in mind that the school sells itself as an institution that produces social justice advocates.

Do not attend this festering waste pile – UNLESS you are receiving full-tuition and a stipend, guaranteed. Even then, I would advise you to stick with your low-paying, dead-end job.
Remember, you are better off making $35K, with only $30K in student loans, than you would be making $40K – with $130K in such debt. If you are currently making a decent salary - or have a family to feed - do not attend this filth pit, under any circumstances.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Taking Ball Shrinkage Disorder to Another Level: US News’s Bob Morse

"Currently, only the top 100 law schools are ranked. Even if U.S. News decides to rank third-tier schools, those that fall into the fourth tier still won’t be given a number."

On January 10, 2011, National Law Journal reported that US News was looking at assigning a numerical rating for third tier law schools.


"It's something that we're looking into," Morse said. "We do have ranking scores for all law schools but, editorially, we didn't want to say, 'This is the 188th law school [representing last place].'"

"U.S. News now provides numerical rankings for the top 100 law schools, but combines the remaining schools into third and fourth tiers without distinguishing between the schools in each tier. Schools within each of those tiers are listed alphabetically. Morse said that the bottom 25% of law schools would continue to be ranked alphabetically."

What a beacon of integrity, huh?!?! I guess Pussy Robert Morse would prefer to see TTTT students take out $130K in student loans rather than offend a dump such as Cooley. (Did anyone see where the article states that USN&WR placed those schools outside the top 100 into the third and fourth tier?)

…Which Somehow Equals “Elimination” of the Third Tier?!:


“In response to interest from both readers and institutions in knowing where more law schools sit, we have extended the list of numerically ranked institutions from the top 100 to the top three-quarters of the schools. The remaining schools are listed alphabetically as the second tier.”

Simply put, Pussy Boy no longer wants to refer to third tier law schools as third tier. Good for him. What a “brave decision” on his part, right?!?! However, the wrinkled vagina does not own the terms “third tier” or “fourth tier.” He has decided to appease the low-ranked trash pits - at the expense of prospective law students. Big surprise, huh?! The “man” is a tool. What would you expect from an industry cockroach such as Robert Morse?

Applying Some Common Sense:

USN&WR assigned and published a numeric figure for third tier law schools. Did these third tier schools suddenly become first tier - because US News designated them as such?!?! Apply some basic logic here. Why would William Mitchell Commode of Law be upset going from 98th to 135th best law school, if they are now in the first tier? They DROPPED 37 spots from last year, but magically ended up in a “higher tier”?!?!

Furthermore, are Creighton, Yale and Cornell really in the same tier? Ask any prospective law student what they think of this designation. The fact that Morse “declares” schools ranked 101-150 as first tier DOES NOT make them first tier. This is akin to a delusional man who declares that his 260 pound wife weighs 130 - when the scale still shows 260. Keep in mind that Morse - for years - assigned a numeric rating for the top 100 law schools, without designating those ranked 51-100 as second tier.

By this twisted "logic," if Morse were to publish the numerical rating for the top 188 schools, would they all be in the first tier?!?! Perhaps, those listed as “unranked” should lobby US News to provide such a rating for all toilets. Let’s ask the schools in the supposed "second tier" - previously labeled fourth tier by USN&WR - if they are happy with the fact that they "moved up" two tiers.


“Suffolk University Law School, The University of South Dakota School of Law and the University of Toledo College of Law each dropped from the third tier to what would have been the fourth tier, but now is called the second tier.”

Shouldn’t these commodes be THRILLED that they actually dropped spots but (supposedly) ended up in a higher tier?!

How Others View US News:


“When the new rankings come out this week, may I suggest that you not post the overall ranking. You all know the overall rank assigned to a school by U.S. News is meaningless, often perniciously so. You all know this. So don't report it. The fact that this garbage appears in what used to be a major 'news' magazine doesn't change the fact that it is garbage.” [Emphasis mine]

[I recognize that Leiter had his own ranking scheme. However, he did thoroughly bitch-slap Morse, in this piece.]


“U.S. News's Robert Morse: To the methodology czar, all you have to do is add one word -- "educational" -- to clarify that when you are asking law professors (and practitioners, for that matter) to assess the quality of each school's program on a scale of 1 to 5, that you are referring to the educational program. Please also remind us that you changed the call of the survey question; I think you used to ask about a school's "reputation," but no more. Now you actually want us to assess the quality of each school's "program." We could use your help in creating this race to the top on education that your ranking system makes possible.” [Emphasis mine]

In the final analysis, US News & World Report is a festering pile of garbage. In particular, Bob Morse’s law school rankings are total nonsense. This comes down to an exercise in politics. The top 14 schools largely remain unchanged from year to year; occasionally you see a top school drop or “improve” by a spot. The lower-tiered schools end up engaging in an education arms race - in the foolish attempt to increase their rating. It is not unusual to see a 6 way tie for 61st best law school in the USN&WR’s rankings. Apparently, this rag does not want to offend a school by placing it in 65th place. (As if 61st is inherently any better.)

After further consideration, you need to have a set of balls before you can suffer from male testicular atrophy. You don’t qualify, Bob Morse. Don’t shave your bush too closely next time. Also, stand tall when you purchase your next tube of Vagisil.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Sweltering Fourth Tier Trash Pit: South Texas College of Law

Tuition: For the 2010-2011 school year, a full-time law student at this commode will be charged $26,340 in tuition and fees. By private law school standards, this is actually a reasonable cost.

Estimated Cost of Attendance: The cess pool estimates that the nine-month COA will amount to $49,640 – for the current school year. However, actual students will require room and board, personal and transportation expenses for twelve months. Taking this into account, we reach a more accurate COA figure of $56,473. Who doesn’t have that type of money to invest in their “education,” right?!


Ranking: According to Pussy Bob Morse and US News & World Report, this school is now “unranked.” The commode is located in what was – until Monday night - referred to as USN&WR’s fourth tier. Luckily, Morse does not own the terms “third tier” or “fourth tier.” The ball-less director of US News’s Research Department has simply chosen to no longer refer to fourth tier law schools as fourth tier.


Supposed Employment and Starting Salary Statistics: The toilet’s “career resources center” asserts that 88% of its Class of 2008 was employed within nine months of graduation. Then again, if one is working in the lumber department at Lowe’s, they are considered “employed” for the purposes of US News, ABA and NALP. This is also the case for JDs tending bar at the Lone Star Saloon - or serving as hostess at The River Oaks Grill.

Furthermore, the school claims that the median salary for its Class of 2009 was $71,000. The school does not list the number or percentage of 2009 graduates reported their income. Law schools - beacons of integrity, ethics and morality that they are - love “creative accounting.”


Average Law Student Indebtedness: According to US News, the average student indebtedness – for those members of STCL’s Class of 2010 who incurred law school debt – was $104,862. Fully 91 percent of this particular graduating class took on such NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt.


Law Faculty Compensation: Head over to page 32 of South Texas Commode of Law’s 2009 IRS Form 990, to see how well some of the “professors” and administrators are doing. We will highlight the five worst offenders. For instance, former president and dean of this dump, James Alfini made $384,985 in TOTAL COMPENSATION - for 2008. In this capacity, Alfini made $347,594 in base compensation; $23,000 in deferred compensation; and $14,391 in nontaxable benefits.

Take a look at how the following “professors” made in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for the same tax year: Catherine Burnett, $259,768; Frank T. Read, $297,955; Jeffrey Rensberger, $258,671; and T. Gerald Treece, $270,178. Since this law school is apparently not attached to a larger university, all of the names listed on page 32 are law faculty.


Law School Numbers Profile: According to this site, the commode awarded full tuition and stipend to 0.2% of its students, for 2005-2006. For the same year, the school provided full tuition scholarships to 0.4% of its customers, and half-tuition scholarships to 1.7 percent of the class. As you can see, the school accepts students with 2.95 UGPAs and LSAT scores of 150.

Furthermore, only 80% of the Class of 2005 was apparently employed within nine months of graduating from this pile of smoldering rot. So, in the midst of the "new economy," the fourth tier stench pile actually improved its placement rate. What an accomplishment!


Some poor soul wanted to know whether he should attend this dung heap. On February 26, 2010 at 9:02 pm, TLS user “RSN_M3” provided some gravity to the discussion:

“I work in a BigLaw firm and every single STCL attorney there tells me to go elsewhere.

According to the attorneys:

1) You have to be top of your class to work in BigLaw
2) Recruiting and career services is virtually nonexistent
3) If you're interested in anything other than litigation, go elsewhere
4) UH absolutely has better placement in BigLaw in Houston than STCL, UH dominates the Houston market. Don't let anyone at STCL tell you otherwise.”

Conclusion: This school is a fifth-rate piece of trash that consigns its students and graduates to a lifetime of debt servitude and TTTT job prospects. News flash: you DO NOT NEED to take on $110K in additional, NON-DISCHARGEABLE student debt to work at a temp hag agency - or for The Home Depot. If this is the best school you can get into, then you need to re-evaluate your decision.

Do you want to be a lawyer so bad that you are willing to incur a mountain of debt, in the process?! Are you willing to mortgage your future on this endeavor? If you are undaunted by the prospects of debt servitude - and do not care about the likelihood of making garbage wages - then go ahead. Remember, YOU will be the one on the hook for loan repayment.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Profiles in Opportunism, Dishonesty and Cognitive Dissonance: Kimber Russell Edition

Yes, we hit the trifecta with today’s subject. By the way, did you finally pull your snout, lips and mouth out of Bob Morse’s ass, Kimber? Good. (When you act like a pig, you will be treated as such - regardless of your gender, i.e. your genitalia will not save you from a well-deserved response.)



This two-headed bitch consistently attacks Elie Mystal, and questions his manhood - but then congratulates LST failures for being named ATL’s “Lawyer of the Year.” Have some integrity, Kimber. Then again, the ingrate frequently slammed JDU posters - but now pretends to be their friend, on that forum.


She entered the movement on May 7, 2010 and by August 30, 2010, Kimber was all too willing to come out. (As if owing Sallie Mae $2,000 a month and being a bar prep salesperson is something to proudly announce to the world.) As you can see, Kimber jumped at the chance to out herself as a scam-blogger, but the moment she sees a potentially bigger trough, she disavows the “so-called scam-blog” movement.



This link provides a decent summation and chronology of events. Listen, moron: YOU chose to make this public. You first wrote a stupid entry, and no one responded. You then saw fit to send an email telling everyone how you no longer want to be associated with the term “scam-blog” - and how we need to work with Bob Morse. You could have shown a modicum of integrity, acted like an adult, and emailed or called me to let me know that you were devastated by my comments on shill Bob Morse. Instead, you decided to act like a demented ape. You then posted these internal emails to JDU, conveniently leaving out the part where you asked to stay in the group. After I calmly stated the facts, you then went on a barely-coherent rant on your little podcast.


You poor, desperate, dishonest soul. I feel sorry that your husband is stuck with your immature, petty 37 year old ass. How often does he attend his Shriveled Ballsacks Anonymous meetings?! By the way, next time you are photographed by a major news publication such as the NYT, could you please not style your hair and dress after English actor Rupert Grint?!

I see that you have now listed BL1Y, as your ally. This is the same person you ridiculed for living in his parents’ Alabama basement, with his NYU law degree. Remember after our interview, you, Mark and I discussed how this guy feels that he is better than us because of his elite credential? You were relentless in attacking BL1Y’s character. Now, he is your friend. (Then again, you openly refer to yourself as “fire-crotch”.)

Cognitive Dissonance:


Look at how this sick pig attacked a 14 year old, back on January 12, 2011. The child was “punished” because she wants to be a lawyer. My guess is the girl has at least 50 IQ points on Kimber. After all, you foolishly believe that working with the ABA and US News will lead to better accountability. Just as American slaves amicably worked with the slave owners to successfully end the institution of slavery, right?!?!


Kimber, YOU were outsmarted by Zenovia Evans. That is all you need to know about Kimber’s “intelligence.”

“Zenovia should have taken that damned ice cream spoon out of her mouth for a few seconds and sought out a mentor of her own to encourage her to make strong personal choices like, oh, I don't know, not duping a bunch of people into believing she was on a hunger strike when her true goal all along was probably just to sell more of her pro-law school books.”

Evans is a tool. However, at least she is not selling bar prep materials to unemployed JDs, many of whom have no shot of being hired as attorneys - even after successfully passing the exam.

“I'm done ranting for now...but I've started a thread over at JDU, so feel free to hop on the "Bash Zenovia" bandwagon over there, or weigh in with your comments below!”

What a picture of mental health, huh?! (I am sorry that you were outsmarted by a Cooley grad - but you were. Congratulations. That is quite an accomplishment.)


Kimber, if you want to kiss Morse’s ass, fine. That is your choice. I would expect nothing less from a crass opportunist and shameless sellout. Make sure you carry some breath mints with you.


She accused ATL’s Elie Mystal of plagiarism without proof. Apparently, someone is showing signs of paranoia and a conspiracy nut mindset.


“There is not a vast conspiracy” - Yeah, we get that, mental midget. No one here said that “law professors” and administrators meet in a smoke-filled bunker, and decide how to screw students. But they KNOW the score, manipulate data, and continue to encourage more to enter this shrinking job sector.

“Get rid of ABA accreditation” - This will not happen, short of a watershed moment. It certainly will not occur by working with the ABA. (Are you stupid enough to believe that the ABA is going to work towards its own destruction?!?!)

“Nando, you are the Glenn Beck of the movement” – Nice talking point, ass-hat. By the way, idiot, my facts are solid. You may not like my tone, or the manner in which I present my case, but my facts are superb. I have talked to actual "law professors" by phone and email. They have told me that my facts are stellar. I have even been contacted for info. Like Glenn Beck, YOU don’t care about the truth.

"Ooooh. I guess I've been punished. Nando took me off his blogroll." - I removed your watered-down site after you took TTR off your blogroll and removed my law school profiles link on DBL. That is your prerogative to do so. However, I am not going to provide traffic for an opportunistic sellout. Don’t let the facts get in the way of your “argument,” Kimber.

Conclusion: Before you enter the next stage of your nervous breakdown, Kimber, remember that you brought this thrashing upon yourself. If you nip at my heels like a flea bag, I will be more than happy to kick you in the ribs. Keep in mind that this tool defends the duplicitous Bob Morse, but attacks a 14 year old girl. Now that I have thoroughly flushed this dishonest turd down the toilet, it is time to wash my hands and move on.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

First Tier Waste Product: American University Washington College of Law

Hello, readers. I was inspired by a piece of garbage in the Alexandria, VA area to profile this first tier stack of dung. This imbecile claims to be a DC Biglaw attorney - and American University JD from the Class of 2007 - making $120K per year. That doesn’t quite add up, does it? Dumbass then asserted that he actually teaches at the University of D.C. school of law (sic).


Tuition: A full-time law student at American University will be charged the perfectly reasonable sum of $42,614, in tuition alone – for the 2010-2011 school year!! General, technology and Sports Center fees will add an extra $844 to the tab. (Hell, the Sports Center annual fee alone accounts for $130.) Part-time students will only need to pay $29,282 in tuition, for the same academic year.

Estimated Cost of Attendance: The commode estimates that the total COA – for 2010-2011 – will amount to $65,646. However, did you see how they reached that figure?! The school only listed housing and food for nine months. How many law students do you know who only need shelter and food for nine months out of the year?! After including these adjusted costs, a more-accurate COA for the current school year would be $70,594.


Ranking: According to US News & World Report, American Univer$ity Washington Commode of Law is the 48th best, most mesmerizing law school in the entire country. (That includes Alaska and Hawaii.) The first tier toilet shares this prestigious honor with three other schools.


Supposed Employment Statistics: The school projects that its Class of 2009 will have a 91.3% employment rate, within nine months of graduation. By the way, only 43 percent of this particular graduating class is in private practice.

Starting Salary Statistics: On page 2, the school points out that its mean public and private sector salaries are slightly higher than the national figures. The private sector mean salary for 2009 WCL grads is $116,812, versus the 2009 national mean of $112,207 - whereas the public sector mean salary for American Law grads is $53,585 compared to the national mean of $50,916. Why not take out $128K in student loans to attend such a prestigious, illustrious law school, right?!?!


Law Student Indebtedness: Here, the school is in truly elite company. As you can see, the school is rated 4th highest – in terms of law student indebtedness. According to US News, the average student indebtedness – for those members of WCL’s Class of 2009 who incurred law school debt – was $128,258. Only 84 percent of this particular graduating class took on such NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt.


Faculty and Administrator Pay: Head over to page 33 of American University’s 2009 Form 990, and take a peek at how well the “professors” are doing, in comparison. Dean Claudio Grossman made $427,201 in TOTAL COMPENSATION – for 2008. Yes, that is correct. Claudio received $381,441 in base compensation; $13,833 in other compensation; $22,999 in deferred compensation; and $8,928 in nontaxable benefits.

“Professor of law and faculty director of the Gushko-Samuelson Intellectual Property Clinic” Peter Jaczi “earned” $287,644 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for the same year. Peter received $251,408 in base compensation; $24,610 in deferred compensation; and $11,626 in nontaxable benefits. “Higher education” sure paid off for these academics.


Entering GPA and LSAT Scores: According to Law School Numbers, the 75th percentile UGPA - for 2005-2006 - was 3.59. The 75th percentile LSAT score was 163. These are rather impressive figures. You could reach these levels, and still end up at a first tier toilet such as American Univer$ity Was$hington Commode of Law.


As a student at this sewage pit, you can write on the Legislation & Policy Brief. Walk into any bar in town, tell the waitress you are a student editor, and she will be thrilled to remove your briefs. Actually, she won’t. Sorry.


If you want some serious action, just become a member of the illustrious Administrative Law Review. The world will be your oyster. (In reality, no one will give a damn about your achievement.)

Conclusion: This school is a grotesquely-overpriced pile of garbage. You do not need to take on an additional $128K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt to go into public interest. This debt will stick with you, for life. If this level of monstrous debt does not dissuade you, then nothing will.

In the final brutal analysis, this school is not that much different from a second tier sewer - in terms of job prospects.
Again, the school’s 2009 graduates had the fourth-highest level of average law school debt, as listed by US News. Keep in mind that this figure includes those students who were fortunate enough to take out much smaller amounts of debt. YOU could end up with closer to $170K in student debt, from law school alone. How will you benefit from taking on such debt, when you land a $54K public sector job?!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Pioneers in Solid Waste: Second Tier Lewis & Clark Law School

Tuition: A full-time student at this law school will be charged $30,456 in tuition and fees, for the 2010-2011 academic year. Those attending the prestigious, part-time Evening Division will only pay $22,826 in tuition and fees, for the current school year.

Total Cost of Attendance: According to this same document, the school lists insurance costs of $1,280 per year; $50 in the annual Loan Repayment Assistance Program fee; clinic fee of $170; $1000 for books; and living expenses of $17,142 per year. For a full time student, this additional $19,912 would bring the estimated COA to $50,368.

For $ome rea$on, most law schools only consider living costs for the 9 month school year. Is this because most law students only have living expenses for nine months out of the year?! My guess is that Lewis & Clark is no different. If this is the case, then living expenses for the year will amount to $22,856. This would bring the total COA - for the 2010-2011 school year - to $56,082.


Ranking: According to Ass-Clown Robert Morse and the drones at US News & World Report, this school is the 64th most amazing, exhilarating and spine-tingling law school in the United States. Hell, it’s almost in the top 30% of ABA-accredited law schools. What an accomplishment!


Alleged Employment Placement Rate: I prefer to allow this commode to state its figures:

“Of the 235 graduates in the Class of 2009, 221 reported actively seeking post-graduate work. Of the 221 seeking, 207 (89.6%) reported securing employment and 10 (4.3%) graduates reported enrolling in full-time degree programs.”

Actually, 207/221 = 93.7 percent. (Conversely, if you were including all graduates in this calculation, then 207/235 = 88.1%.) Is that what you would like us to believe?! Also, 10/221 = 4.5%. Is it your claim that a combined 98.2 percent, of those seeking employment, are employed or enrolled in a full-time program?!?!

Claimed Starting Salary Info: This same page SHOWS that only 79 graduates of the Class of 2009 provided salary information. This means that a mere 38.2% of the employed grads bothered to report this info! Why would that be?!?! This being the case, the median starting salary for full-time positions requiring bar passage is $62,000. Imagine what the overall median would be, if all 207 employed members of this graduating class had furnished their salary info.


Law Student Indebtedness: Apparently, the tramps and hobos at US News are still “working to fix this problem.”


Faculty and Administrator Pay: Let’s head over to pages 35 and 36 of Lewis & Clark College’s 2009 Form 990, so we can see discover how well the “professors“ are doing. Dean Robert Klonoff made $265,956 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for 2008! He received $224,418 in base compensation; $5,000 in bonus and incentive compensation; and $36,538 in nontaxable benefits. Wait, there are more gluttons at the trough.

Take a look at the TOTAL COMPENSATION figures for the following “professors of law”: Edward Brunet, $212,595; William Funk, $200,825; Brian Blum, $189,436; Craig Johnson, $183,661; and Susan Mandiberg, $188,582. “Teaching law” and archaic legal theory can be a very lucrative career, indeed.


As a student at this second tier sewer, you will have the rare opportunity to write onto the nation’s oldest law review devoted solely to environmental law issues. Imagine the reaction when you tell friends, neighbors, employers and beautiful women that you are a student editor at Environmental Law!!


Look at my submission for the Admissions Office “Question of the Week”: “Why does the 64th best law school in the U.S. insist on charging its students $30,456 in annual tuition and fees?”


Look! You can earn a cerTTTificaTTTe in Global Law!! All your childhood hopes and dreams can come true! Yay! Be careful who you inform of your “credential.” You wouldn’t want Salma Hayek breaking into your house, climbing on top of you, running her nails down your chest, and slamming your dome against the headboard, would you?!?!

Conclusion: This school is an overpriced sewage pit. You do not need to take out $100K-$165K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE loans, in order to work in the non-profit world. The school itself notes that only 79 of all 207 employed graduates - from the Class of 2009 - reported their salary to the school. The median starting salary for jobs requiring a law license was not great, i.e. $62,000. Think about those JDs who could not find legal employment - or those struggling to make ends meet, on a toiletlawyer salary. If you simply MUST be an attorney at all costs – i.e. your life will end unless you attain this goal – then go for it. Just don’t say you weren’t warned, idiot.
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