Friday, April 15, 2011
Haul Out the Waste: Announcing the Second Tier Trash Can Seton Hall University School of Law Annual Award Dinner Dance
[I previously covered this foul toilet back on April 8, 2010. However, I received an email from a graduate of this decrepit, morally bankrupt and rotten toilet a couple of weeks ago. In that correspondence, “Mr. Mutt” included a PDF file of the invitation pictured above. Plus, this particular toilet is worth flushing twice.]
Tuition: As you can see, a full-time law student at this Catholic commode will be charged the un-godly sum of $45,048 in tuition and fees - for the 2010-2011 school year. Part-time students will only be sodomized to the tune of $33,981 for the same academic year. That is a great relief, huh?!
Total Cost of Attendance: Under the worst-case scenario, i.e. a full-time student living independently, the total estimated COA - for 2010-2011 - will be $67,800. By the way, you can be certain that this toilet is only calculating living expenses on the nine-month calendar. Using a twelve month estimate would give us a more accurate total COA of $74,100 for the current school year. What a nice Christian institution.
Ranking: According to the emergency reserve of toilet paper known as US News & World Report, SHU Law is the 61st greatest, most outstanding, exhilarating and fantastic law school in the United States. It shares this “prestigious honor” with five other stench pits.
Self-Reported Employment and Starting Salary Statistics: According to the sewage pit, “The employment rate for the Class of 2010 within nine months of graduation was 86.71% with 98.75% of the graduates reporting employment information. We are proud of our track record of ensuring that our graduates have obtained gainful, meaningful employment. 97.08% of the Class of 2010 graduates known to be employed reported employer type and 51.82% reported salary.”
For $ome rea$on, the commode lists the median salary of those in private practice as $125,000. Sure it was - and actress Jennifer Beals climbed on top of me, spent the night, and just made waffles. Apparently, the career services cockroaches do not include those SHU lawyers working on low-wage doc review assignments, in reaching this figure.
Average Law Student Indebtedness: US News lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the SHU JD Class of 2010 who incurred law school debt - as $112,772. Fully 82 percent of this poor, unfortunate graduating class took on such debt. What a great deal for TTT job prospects, right?!?!
Faculty and Administrator Pay: Let’s head to page 18 of $eTTon Hall Univer$iTTy’s 2009 IRS Form 990, to see how well the pigs are making out. You can see that dean Patrick Hobbs made $339,866 in TOTAL COMPENSATION - for 2008.
Hobbs is not the only "educator" getting fat on the federal teat. Here are the TOTAL COMPENSATION figures for the following “law professors”: the bulbous-headed Stephen Lubben, $311,110; Erik Lillquist, $274,522; Kathleen “Pig Face” Boozang, $272,502; and John Cornwell, $270,345.
Annual Awards Dance Dinner: As “Mr. Mutt” wrote, in his email -
“The event takes place in swanky Short Hills, NJ. But doesn't 'Valvoline' Dean Pat Hobbs keep telling potential students how Newark NJ is undergoing a 'Renaissance'? Yet this oily music man holds his alumni gala in upscale Short Hills. I guess the pretty people who donate $25,000 to sponsor this snob fest may not want to play the 'car jacking' lottery if the event was to take place near the law school's Newark campus. (It is true, car jackings have reportedly been taking place at a rate of 12 per night in Newark). Notice how recent law graduates (class of 2006-2010) get a great 'discount' rate of $150 per person to attend this sewer party! I wonder why this discount is necessary as the schools employment statistics tout 94 plus percent employment and six figure salaries galore!”
One can reserve an individual seat for $250, or a table of 12 for a mere $3,000. However, the cost per seat is only $150 per person for the classes of 2006-2010. Members of the JD classes of 2000-2005 and attorneys practicing in public interest will only be charged $200 per seat.
If anyone is interested in sponsorship opportunities, here is the info: Presenting Sponsor, $25,000; Diamond Level, $20,000; Platinum Level, $15,000; Gold Level, $10,000; Silver Level, $5,000; Bronze Level, $2,500; and Copper Level, $1,000. Presenting Sponsors purchase a front inside cover location, back cover location, or back inside cover location. A full color, full page event program advertisement is also included, as well as two complimentary. Whereas the Copper Level affords you a listing in the TT event program. If anyone wants a digital copy of this invitation, email me at email@example.com.
Conclusion: Seton Hall University Sewer of Law is a festering stink pit. It charges its students in excess of $45K per year in tuition and fees, fills them with “legal doctrine” and dumps them into the FLOODED New Jersey/New York lawyer job market. Then it has the nerve to ask these debt-soaked JDs to donate to this garbage event. Does anyone think that this fundraiser will help keep tuition affordable at this dump?!?!
Posted by Nando at 6:51 AM