Monday, July 18, 2011
Stink Pit Central: Fourth Tier Dung Pile Thomas M. Cooley Law School Sues Bloggers
As many of you are aware, the “non-profit” corporation and in$TTTTiTTTTuTTTion of “higher educaTTTTion” known as Thomas M. Cooley Law School, Tax ID Number 38-1988915, has sued four bloggers for defamation. For some reason, the commode filed suit in Ingham County Circuit Court.
What’s that you say, apologist? Thomas M. Cooley Law Sewer is actually rated as the second-best law school in the country – according to its own ranking scheme?! Let’s take a look at the twelfth edition, 2010, guide entitled “Judging the Law Schools.”
“An extensive, objective comparison of American law schools by a distinguished jurist and a law school president who challenge the subjectivity of the U.S. News & World Report rankings.” [Emphasis mine]
If you head to page 4, you will notice in the foreword, that this 424 page report was put together by Thomas E. Brennan, founder and former president of Thomas M. Cooley Law School, and Don LeDuc, president and dean of Thomas M. Cooley Law School. At least, they disclosed this info. I’m sure that these $elf-intere$ted men were very impartial and objective, in publishing this asinine “study.”
Go to page 22 of this PDF, to see where Cooley ranks itself as the 2nd best law school in the land, right behind Harvard! Yeah, sure this is the second most prestigious law school in the U.S. – and Salma Hayek just carved her initials into my back with her fingernails this morning! Now let’s take a look at the rankings that employers actually consider when making hiring decisions.
Ranking: The editors at US “News” & World Report do not quite share Cooley’s opinion. In fact, the magazine lists Thomas M. Cooley as “Rank Not Published.” It failed to make it into the top three tiers, i.e. the vaunted top 144 law schools. As such, it is a filthy, fourth tier pile of hot excrement. What a prestigious institution, huh?!
By the way, the school decided not to hire a Cooley-trained lawyer, for this suit. As you can, see neither of the attorneys named as counsel graduated from TTTThoma$ M. Cooley Law $chool. One earned his law degree from Georgetown University, while the other attorney received his JD from the University of Michigan.
I suppose that it is better to hire attorneys who went to real law schools. Then again, Cooley’s rankings scheme rates Georgetown as the third best law school in the land, whereas the University of Michigan Law School is listed as 12th. Perhaps the school was smart (for once) not to hire someone from 30th-rated Stanford or 31st-ranked Duke. By the way, how in the hell is the University of Chicago ranked 5th by US “News” - but listed as 41st best by Brennan and LeDuc?!
Salary Info for LeDuc and Brennan: Head to page 37 of this commode’s 2009 IRS Form 990. There you will see that Don LeDuc, dean and president, made $548,067 in TOTAL COMPENSATION - for the 2008 calendar year. The mustachioed LeDuc received $400,000 in base compensation; $75,000 in bonus & incentive compensation; $31,644 in other compensation; $19,160 in deferred compensation; and $22,263 in nontaxable benefits.
Thomas E. Brennan, founder and former president of the law school, somehow “earned” $368,581 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for the same tax year. Brennan received $329,198 in base compensation; $19,160 in deferred compensation; and $20,223 in nontaxable benefits. (Under his faculty profile, Brennan is listed as founder, president and dean emeritus, and “professor.” According to his faculty bio, he is also the chairman of the Thomas M. Cooley Board of Directors.) Do you think that these two men might have a financial stake in preserving the status quo?!?!
Stated Mission and School Financial Info: On page 2 of this tax document, the school states that its mission is to “Prepare graduates for the legal profession with practical legal education as its guiding principle and focus” - under Summary. On the same page, Section A, Part I, line 9, you can see that the school’s revenue in 2008 was $96,091,697. Of this amount, $44,769,472 went to salaries, other compensation and employee benefits. This is on Part I, line 15. On Part I, lines 20-22, you will note that this foul pile of waste had $231,587,804 in end of year total assets, balanced by $149,977,265 in liabilities. See how profitable it can be to operate a “non-profit educational institution”?!?!
Business Transactions With Interested Parties/Conflicts of Interest: Go over to page 42, Schedule L, Part IV, to check out some interesting “business transactions.” As you can see, “professor” Curt Benson is listed as the husband of Jane Markey, a member of the Board of Directors. How well did he make out?! His “transaction” was in the amount of $168,367 for “salary and benefits received as a faculty member.” I guess this poses no conflict of interest.
Furthermore, Daven Danielson, in Desktop Support, is the son of Brent Danielson, a member of the Board of Directors. He brought in $31,522 for “salary and benefits received as a staff member.” Lastly, Laura LeDuc, daughter of Don Leduc, president and dean of the law sewer, made $4,576 for “salary and benefits received as a staff member.” I remember “law professors” constantly harping on avoiding the appearance of impropriety. I guess that only applies to law students and lawyers, not the faculty. At least, there are no other COIs going on at this school, right? Actually, head to Schedule O, on page 45, where the toilet discloses: “Two members of the Board of Directors are related by marriage.”
"With ethics and professionalism at the core of our law school's values, we cannot – and will not – sit back and let anyone circulate defamatory statements about Cooley or the choices our students and alumni made to seek their law degree here," said Brent Danielson, chair of Cooley's board, in an announcement of the suits.”
Yes, Thomas M. Cooley Law School is synonymous with professionalism and ethics, isn’t it?!?!
Conclusion: In the final analysis, Thomas M. Cooley Law Sewer’s reputation is lower than fresh monkey feces. The school administrators and “professors” merely want to keep the gravy train rolling. MANY, if not most, of this dung pit’s former students will never practice law. In contrast, the staff and faculty are paid up front, in full. The students, graduates and dropouts are stuck with NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt. Additionally, the school will argue that it is providing a “legal education” - not guaranteeing anyone a job.
Posted by Nando at 4:54 AM