Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Year’s Moist, Drizzling Waste: Third Tier University of Akron School of Law

What better way to flush another year down the commode than to profile a true laughingstock? Due to popular demand, I am now featuring a staple of the third tier, i.e. the University of Akron Sewer of Law.

Tuition: Ohio residents, attending this dung pit on a full-time basis, will pay $21,873.20 in tuition and fees - for the 2011-2012 school year. Full-time, out of state law students will be charged $34,428.20 in tuition and fees, for 2011-2012.

Resident, part-time law students at Akron will only be hit with a bill of $14,068.65 for tuition and fees for the current academic year, whereas non-resident, part-time Akron law students will pay $22,020.15. Who says that public law schools don’t provide a strong “education” at a decent price?!?!

Estimated Total Cost of Attendance: The morons provide different tuition and fee totals, on this page. For $ome rea$on, this page lists lower tuition and fees figures for full-time students, but higher costs than those detailed for part-time students. Using the amounts from the tuition archive PDF, we will then add the living expenses furnished by the commode. According to the school, room and board, books and supplies, transportation, and personal costs will add another $16,034 to the tab.

Then again, the pigs only calculate nine-month living expenses. Seeing that actual law students will require twelve months of room, meals, transportation, and miscellaneous costs, this cumulative figure would actually amount to $21,078.67. Therefore, full-time law students - who are Ohio residents - will face an estimated total COA of $42,951.87 - for 2011-2012. Non-residents attending this foul cesspool on a full-time basis are looking at a total COA of $55,506.87 - for the 2011-2012 school year.

Ranking: With such high costs, for a public institution, this school must certainly have one hell of a reputation in legal and academic circles, right?!?! Well, according to Bob Morse and U.S. “News” & World Report, the Univer$iTTTy of Akron Sewer of Law is the 127th greatest, most fantastic and amazing law school, in the United States. The trash pit shares this pathetic rating with four other schools, i.e. CreighTTTon, Mercer, $amford, and the University of Idaho.

Employment Placement and Starting Salary Info: The dung pile furnished data that it sent to NALP, for its Class of 2010 report. Based on this self-reported info, 91.8% of the Akron Law Class of 2010 was employed within nine months of graduation. Yeah, sure they were - and Salma Hayek is going to dig her nails into my back tonight. Then again, if you are selling insurance policies for Allstate, stocking shelves at Home Depot, or serving drinks at The Sky Lounge in Akron, then you are “employed” for the purposes of NALP and the ABA.

On page 2 of this PDF, you will notice that of the 49 grads who reported working in private practice, 26 were working in firms of 2-10 lawyers. This represents 53.1 percent of those Akron JDs - from the Class of 2010 - working as lawyers. Additionally, another 5 desperate grads from this unfortunate class went into solo practice, upon receiving their TTT law diploma. On this page, the school claims that the average starting salary for this class was $55,980. Do you like your chances coming out of this toilet now, lemmings?!?!

Average Law Student Indebtedness: USN&WR lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the Univer$iTTTy of Akron’s JD Class of 2010 who incurred debt for law school - as $60,149. Furthermore, 84% of this third tier toilet’s 2010 class took on such corrosive debt. This amount does not take undergraduate debt into account.

Administrator and Faculty Salary Data: According to the Buckeye Institute for Public Policy Solutions, Martin H. Belsky made $239,218 in base pay, as dean of the sewer of law - in 2010. Likewise, William S. Jordan, III - associate dean and C. Blake McDowell, Jr. “professor of law” - “earned” $165,115, in base salary - for the same year. Furthermore, Wilson Huhn - another C. Blake McDowell, Jr. "professor of law" - received $171,241 in base compensation. Who doesn’t love this wealth transfer program - from indebted students and taxpayers to failed lawyers masquerading as “professors”?!?!

Conclusion: In the final analysis, this school is a true embarrassment to the term “institution of higher leaning.” If students from top law schools are finding it increasingly difficult to find legal jobs, how in the hell do you - as a recent graduate of, or current student at, Third Tier Akron - figure that you will make it in this field?!?! Remember that connections, family name and prestige matter. You can sometimes overcome deficits, in these critical areas, by being exceptional. However, if you do not even have decent academic credentials, you will likely not get your foot in the door. In all honesty, when decent employers see University of Akron on your law degree, most will not be impressed.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Second Tier Hog Waste: University of Arkansas School of Law

Tuition: In-state students, attending this public sewer on a full-time basis, will be charged $11,932.80 in tuition and fees, for the 2011-2012 school year. (The pigs do not mention that the listed costs represent per semester prices.) Out-of-state, full-time law students at this school will pay $24,528.30 in tuition and fees – for 2011-2012.

Ranking: According to US “News” & World Report, the UniversiTTy of Arkansas Sewer of Law is the 84th best, most amazing law school in the nation. In fact, the school landed in an eleven-way tie for the highly-coveted 84th place! Who wouldn’t want to attend such a “prestigious” institution?!?!

Employment and Starting Salary Statistics: Apparently, the school is unable or unwilling to provide job placement and starting salary data. Here is the sewage pit’s description:

“Employment, salary, and bar passage statistics for students, graduates, and employers. As a member of the National Association for Law Placement, we receive statistical information on legal employment throughout the United States and elsewhere.”

According to Law School Numbers, 75.9 percent of this school’s JD Class of 2005 was employed within nine months of graduation. That figure is truly embarrassing! From the perspective of law students and recent graduates, it is horrifying. By the way, LSN notes that a total of TEN law firms participated in OCI - for 2007-2008! What amazing success, huh?!?! With such anemic results, the commode should be ashamed to charge out-of-state, full-time law students $24,538.30 in tuition - for the current academic year. Somehow, I doubt that the faculty loses much sleep over this situation.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: US “News” lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the Univer$iTTy of Arkan$a$ JD Class of 2010 who incurred debt for law school - as $56,358. Furthermore, 81 percent of this second tier sewer’s 2010 class took on such toxic debt. This amount does not take undergraduate debt into account.

Administrator and Faculty Salary Data: According to this Arkansas Democrat-Gazette article - published on January 18, 2009 at 5:59 am - Cynthia Nance, then-dean of the law school, “earned” $199,100. Lonnie Beard, “professor of law,” made $182,949, whereas dean emeritus Robert Moberly raked in $178,738. These are not outrageous salaries, but they presumably permit one to live quite handsomely in the Fayetteville, AR area.

As a student at this public dung pit, you will have the unique opportunity to write onto the Journal of Food Law & Policy. Imagine how women and potential employers will react when they see this experience on your resume!

If you are interested in seeking a more “prestigious” law journal to partake in, then look no further than the Journal of Islamic Law & Culture. From the school’s description:

“The purpose of The Journal of Islamic Law & Culture is to encourage scholarship and dialog that fosters a deeper understanding of the law and public policy of Islamic religion and culture, particularly as it intersects with Western law and society, including the legal and social communities of the United States. The Journal invites the submission of manuscripts from the legal and non-legal communities, and from Muslim and non-Muslim researchers. The Journal is particularly interested in articles on issues relating to Islam and Muslims in the United States and comparative topics addressing Islam and other religious or cultural traditions.”

Conclusion: The University of Arkansas Sewer of Law is a regional law school - and that is being kind to the institution. While this is the flagship law school in the state, do not expect to make a big-ass salary coming out of this commode. Hell, the school’s “Office of Career Planning and Placement” did not furnish employment placement and starting salary figures, for its recent grads. That ought to tell you something.

In the end, you DO NOT NEED to take on an additional $60K-$85K for a chance to become a lawyer. In fact, if you cannot find a decent-paying job or career soon after graduation, then you will likely be in worse financial shape than before you entered law school. Remember, “higher education” is a commodity in this nation. The “educators” and administrators are paid up front, in full. You, the student and graduate, will be stuck re-paying for this “investment” - plus interest - for the next 25-30 years.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Second Tier Steaming Pile of Waste: Case Western Reserve University School of Law

Tuition: Law students, attending this trash pit on a full-time basis, will pay $42,450 in tuition - for the 2011-2012 school year. The school is certainly looking out for its students’ interests, right?!?!

Total Cost of Attendance: The commode estimates that the student activities fee, health insurance, books and supplies, and living expenses will add another $20,182 to the tab. Then again, the pigs only consider nine month living costs. Seeing that actual law students face twelve month expenses, a more accurate total COA - for 2011-2012 - would amount to $65,170.

Ranking: Based on these prohibitive costs, this school MUST have one hell of a reputation in the academic and legal communities! Well, according to Pussy Bob Morse and US “News” & World Report, Ca$e We$TTern Re$erve Univer$iTTy Sewer of Law is the 61st greatest, most amazing and fantastic law school in the United States. It shares this “prestigious honor” with the following five dung heaps: Georgia State, Chicago-Kent, Seton Hall, Temple and the University of Cincinnati. Their mothers must be very proud.

Supposed Employment Placement and Starting Salary Statistics: Under the Careers For Prospective Students tab, the sewage pit claims the following:

“Our 2010 graduates (the most recent information available) enjoyed a 91.6% employment rate, securing employment in private practice, judicial clerkships, public interest organizations, government agencies, businesses, and more. The median starting salary for the Class of 2010 was $65,000.”

The rats also note that this info was “compiled in accordance with the standards used by the National Association for Law Placement.” Yes, hide behind that “standard,” you brave bastards. Unsuspecting law school applicants may not be aware that JDs working as telemarketers, insurance salesmen and Burger King managers are considered “employed” - for the purposes of the NALP survey.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: US “News” lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the CWRU Law Class of 2010 who incurred debt for law school - as $94,150. Keep in mind that 81 percent of this trash pit’s 2010 class took on such toxic debt. Again, this figure does not take undergraduate debt into account. Remember, the school itself asserts a median starting salary of $65K, for its Class of 2010.

Administrator Salaries: Let’s take a look at Case Western Reserve University’s 2010 Form 990. On the bottom of page 1, you will notice that the university had $1,725,158,386 in end-of-year net assets. There is a financial killing to be made in “higher education.”

Due to a bloated, big-ass administration and a dental school, no “law professors” are listed among the highest-compensated employees. For instance, on page 40, you will see that university “president” Barbara R. Snyder made $778,874 in TOTAL COMPENSATION, for the tax year ending June 30, 2010. Snyder “earned” $525,946 in base compensation; $75,000 in bonus and incentive compensation; $126,985 in “other” compensation; $26,412 in deferred compensation; and $24,531 in nontaxable benefits. You do not need to personally contribute to this gigantic salary, by incurring a mountain of additional student debt.

As a student at this festering pool of rat piss, you can write onto the “world renowned” Case Western Reserve Journal of Law, Technology & the Internet!! Yes, you can truly set yourself apart from the glut of legal job applicants. Actually, your resume and cover letter will be used as a coaster, by the law firm hiring partner.

If you prefer, you can become a student editor at the equally idiotic Canada-United States Law Journal. Remember, law firms and government agencies want people who can hit the ground running - not gerbils with tertiary journal experience.

Conclusion: Case Western Reserve University Sewer of Law is a grossly overpriced pile of dung, located in the “financially thriving” Cleveland job market. In the final analysis, you simply DO NOT need to take on an additional $100K-$150K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, for a chance to practice law. The stench of this putrid school will follow you, when you are applying for legal and non-law positions.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Michael Olivas, Nelson P. Miller and Brian Leiter: Mental Midgets or Pathologically Dishonest Academics?

Michael Olivas Doesn’t Understand That Car Loans Differ From Student Loans?!:

On December 2, 2011, Jonathan Berr wrote a piece for Daily Finance entitled “Should Law Schools Pay Some Students to Drop Out?”

“Should law school students be eligible for tuition refunds if they decide they'd rather not accumulate six-figures in debt studying for a career in which job prospects are dismal? That's what two Yale University professors recently argued in Slate. The National Association of Law Schools, not surprisingly, rejected the idea.

"The hypothetical was an absurd one," said Michael A. Olivas, the association's president, adding that he is not aware of any law students who have actually made such a request. "We have never guaranteed that our graduates will have jobs."

Olivas, a law professor at the University of Houston, makes a persuasive case that letting law school students escape their debts is a bad idea. After all, he notes that people have to pay off their car loans even if they grow tired of their vehicles.” [Emphasis mine]

Of course, Olivas the Shill vehemently disagrees with this analysis. Self interest typically trumps everything else. I understand why he would claim that his association has never guaranteed that law graduates will find employment. Technically, he is not lying - at this point. Then again, the law school pigs publish inflated employment numbers. However, this bearded fool engages in INTELLECTUAL DISHONESTY when he tries to equate student debt with a car loan.

Let me point out the following to you, Michael: you can walk away from a car loan. The dealer can repossess the automobile - and perhaps move for damages and attorney’s fees. However, the loan will not cost six figures or financially ruin the borrower for the next 25-30 years. Furthermore, the dealer or bank bears some of the risk of making stupid loans. As you are aware, Ass-Clown, student loans are NON-DISCHARGEABLE.

Nelson P. Miller Engages in Statistical Nonsense:

On December 9, 2011, Paul Campos, law professor at the University of Colorado-Boulder, wrote a scathing indictment on Nelson P. Miller of TTTThoma$ M. Cooley Law $chool. His entry was labeled “I can’t believe it’s a law dean.”

“If I were the dean of a law school that was getting sued for luring students to my school via wildly misleading employment and salary figures, here's what Item One on my day planner would not be: "Publish op-ed full of wildly misleading employment figures in legal employment magazine."

But I'm not Nelson Miller, dean of the Thomas M. Cooley School of Law's Grand Rapids campus. The charitable interpretation of Miller's defense of legal education as a "value proposition," as they say in the B-school literature, is that he is a profoundly stupid man who is incapable of understanding even the simplest statistical arguments. The realistic interpretation is that he is a profoundly dishonest man, who is quite capable of making what he fully realizes are utterly misleading arguments, if doing so is necessary, in his calculated view, to preserve his salary.”
[Emphasis mine]

Campos is referring to this piece of drivel, which was written by Nelson Miller and sent to Vivia Chen of The Careerist. Here is an excrementitiously foul excerpt:

“The national economic downturn hurt the legal profession, but lawyers clearly fared well compared to the general population and other management and professional occupations. Recent law graduates have not fared as well as more experienced lawyers, but they still fare better than the general population.”

Such asinine “arguments” indicate that Nelson P. Miller is: (a) clueless; or (b) patently dishonest. An unemployed pizza delivery guy does not need to spend seven years of his life - plus $100K in student loans - for such a position.

Brian Leiter’s Vagina Still Hurts Because of the New York Times:

Brian Leiter has posted no less than seven bitch responses to David Segals’ November 19, 2011 New York Times piece above, which was entitled “What They Don’t Teach Law Students: Lawyering.” This latest Segal article on U.S. "legal education" obviously burned Leiter's ass. Apparently, it has affected his nether regions, as well. Try applying some Vagisil to the area, Brian. Then take a cue from your colleague, Emory “law professor” Sarah K. Stadler and “Get over it!!” After all, you are not the one incurring six figures in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt - while facing an anemic legal job market.

According to his faculty bio, Michael Olivas has received an extensive education. In fact, he has an M.A. and Ph.D. from Ohio State University, and a law degree from Georgetown. Nelson P. Miller, associate dean at the Grand Rapids campus of Fourth Tier Trash Pit Thomas M. Cooley Law School, earned a B.A. from Indiana University “with highest honors.” He also graduated cum laude from the University of Michigan Law School. Lastly, Brian Leiter graduated from Princeton, before attaining a JD and Ph.D. from the University of Michigan.

Conclusion: I leave it up to you to decide whether these $elf-intere$ted academics are (a) completely clueless ass-hats; or (b) intentionally dishonest pigs. Anyone with an IQ above 80 - and one ounce of integrity - can figure this out. To paraphrase Paul Campos:

The kind interpretation of their idiotic defenses of “legal education” is that these three “educators” are profoundly stupid men who are incapable of understanding even the simplest statistical arguments. The realistic interpretation is that they are profoundly dishonest men, who are quite capable of making what they fully realize are utterly misleading arguments, if doing so is necessary, in their calculated view, to preserve their big-ass salaries.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Humid, Second Tier Waste Pile: University of Nebraska-Lincoln College of Law

Tuition and Fees: In-state residents attending the University of Nebraska Commode of Law – on a full-time basis – will pay $12,906.50 in tuition and fees, for the 2011-2012 school year. Non-resident, full time law students, at this dung pit, will be charged $29,524 in tuition and fees – for 2011-2012. However, the pigs note that UNL law students take 18 credits their first semester:

“First year students take 18 credit hours the first semester and 15 credit hours the second semester. First year tuition and fees for a resident are $13,886.75. First year tuition and fees for a nonresident are $29,966.00.” [Emphasis mine]

Ranking: According to US “News” & World Report, the Univer$iTTy of Nebra$ka College of Law is rated as the 84th best law school in the land. Of course, it shares this prestigious "honor" with ten other schools, i.e. DePaul, Hofstra, LSU, Rutgers-Camden, Rutgers-Neward, Santa Clara, Seattle University, SUNY-Buffalo, Arkansas-Fayetteville, and Villanova!! Apparently, Pussy Bob Morse made some awkward political calculations when assigning scores.

Employment and Starting Salary Figures: The school claims the following: 89.6% of graduates completing the survey (116 = 95%) either reported employment (99 = 85.3%) or were enrolled in a full time degree program (5 = 4.3%).

The toilet admits that only 85.3 percent of its Class of 2010 reported being employed, presumably within nine months of graduation. That is embarrassing, but this is the highest-ranked law school in the state. Furthermore, the school features relatively small class sizes.

By the way, the Career Services Office hags LIED when they published the following: “The employment statistics for graduates of the University of Nebraska College of Law remain above the national average.”

According to the NALP Class of 2010 National Summary Chart, 87.6% of respondents reported being employed within nine months of graduation, whereas 2.9 percent reported pursuing another degree. Hence, the lying pigs are trying to pull one over on prospective students - as the national figures are better than the results produced by this dung heap.

Regarding starting income info, the CSO published an overall median starting figure of $49,000 – for the Class of 2010. The salary range published is $19,000-$150,000. The median starting salary, for those 2010 grads working in law firms, is listed as $51,500. The purported range was $32,500-$150,000.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: USN&WR lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the University of Nebraska JD Class of 2010 who incurred debt for law school - as $49,706. Fully 90 percent of this school’s 2010 class took on such toxic debt. Keep in mind that this figure does not take undergraduate debt into account.

Faculty and Administrator Salaries: Head to page 115 of this PDF entitled “Fiscal Year 2011-2012 Personnel Roster, University of Nebraska.” Near the bottom of page 115 of the file - labeled as page 111 - you will see the subheading TOTAL WAGES AND SALARIES for the College of Law. This document does not itemize the entire figure, so we are uncertain if this info includes nontaxable benefits, deferred compensation, etc. On page 4, the Fiscal Period is listed as July 1, 2011 through June 30, 2012.

You will notice that Susan Poser - dean of the commode of law, as well as “Richard and Catherine Schmoker professor of law” - will make $290,850, in TOTAL, for the current fiscal year. The following amounts represent TOTAL salary figures for the current fiscal year: Robert C. Denicola, “Margaret R. Larson Professor of Intellectual Property Law,” will rake in $231,264; Martin R. Gardner, “Steinhart Foundation professor of law,” will “earn” $219,241; and goofy-ass Steven L. Willborn, “Judge Harry A. Spencer professor of law,” will make $231,264. Who says that “higher education” doesn’t pay off?! Isn’t it great to see the wealth transfer - from the debt-strapped students to the “professors” - in action?!?!

Conclusion: The University of Nebraska Commode of Law is a public stink pile. When you drive through the state, the humidity and lake effect burn your nostrils. If you enjoy large insects and giant bugs - on top of the perpetual foul odor - then maybe you will not mind spending three years in this area. Keep in mind that even those from the area cannot stand living in Omaha or Lincoln, and those are the largest cities in the state. At any rate, you do not need to piss away seven years of your life - for a chance to make $30K-$50K as a toilet-lawyer. The average debt load, from this rot pile, is not egregious. However, it does not take undergrad student loans into account. If your undergrad student loan debt is a minimal $20K, then an additional $50K-$70K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, can bust you up financially - especially if you cannot find a job, or if you come out making $35K per year.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

First Tier Indigestion: Indiana University Maurer School of Law

Tuition: Indiana residents attending this school, on a full-time basis will, pay $27,040 in tuition - for the 2011-2012 school year. With mandatory fees and books and supplies thrown in, this combined figure reaches $29,930. Out-of-state, full-time law students at this commode will be charged $44,512, for the current academic year. After adding required fees, plus books and supplies, total direct costs amount to $47,402.

Ranking: According to the bitches and hags at US “News” & World Report, the Indiana University Maurer Sewer of Law is the 23rd ranked law school in the land.

Supposed Employment Placement Rate and Starting Salary Figures: Notice how the deceptive cockroaches attempt to compare IU grads from 2003-2010 to NALP’s Overall JD Class of 2010 data - under Class of 2010: By the Numbers. The CSO dogs do not list a job placement rate. Under the subheading Where Graduates Find Jobs: Firms, note that the swine merely lists purported employment by law firm size - from 2003-2010. Even under this permissive standard, you can see that relatively few Indiana Law grads are practicing Biglaw.

This is duplicitous conduct, because the school is not publishing info strictly from the Indiana University JD Class of 2010. The commode is including data, for several years - from well before the job market went straight to hell - and is using this to bolster its student outcomes. At the bottom of the page, the pigs merely list the names of firms, courts and government agencies that supposedly hired IU Maurer grads, from the Class of 2010. By the way, this stink pit does list median salaries by sector, for its 2010 graduates. Keep in mind that William Henderson, who teaches at this cesspool, noted that median starting salary data is MISLEADING - as relative few recent grads earn the median figures. For $ome rea$on, he apparently does not have any qualms with his employer providing deceptively vague data.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: USN&WR lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the Indiana University-Bloomington Law Class of 2010 who incurred debt for law school - as $113,538. By the way, 93 percent of this school’s 2010 class took on such miserable debt. That is one hell of a price tag, for diminishing returns in the job market.

Faculty and Administrator Salary Info: Let’s see how well the pigs made out, in comparison to the indentured debt servants. The Indianapolis Star lists public employee salaries, but does not provide anything newer than 2008. As you can see, Lauren K. Robel made $303,970 in salary, whereas Alfred C. Aman, Jr. raked in $233,500. Supposed “legal rebel” William Henderson made $159,250.

Hypocrisy in Action: William Henderson

In David Segal’s ass-kicking New York Times piece “Is Law School a Losing Game,” from January 8, 2011, Henderson the Pig feigned moral outrage at the law school scheme:

"How do law schools depict a feast amid so much famine?

“Enron-type accounting standards have become the norm,” says William Henderson of Indiana University, one of many exasperated law professors who are asking the American Bar Association to overhaul the way law schools assess themselves. “Every time I look at this data, I feel dirty.”
[Emphasis mine]

On August 2, 2011, Henderson the Apologist wrote a piece for the National Law Journal labeled “More data but less transparency.” Here is a foul excerpt:

“In the wake of hard-hitting stories in The Wall Street Journal and The New York Times, sens. Barbara Boxer (D-Calif.) and Charles Grassley (R-Iowa) have begun a very public correspondence with ABA President Stephen Zack. But several months before these headlines, the ABA Section of Legal Education and Admissions to the Bar had already begun the painful process of creating a better, more transparent system for tracking employment outcomes.”

What a difference seven months makes, huh?! Perhaps he can stick his snout further up the ABA’s corroded ass.

Conclusion: This school is grossly overpriced, and the pigs do not even bother to publish employment “placement” and starting salary statistics. Unless, of course, you are a dumb-ass and feel that listing vague data suffices. You simply DO NOT NEED to incur an additional $115K-$150K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt, for a chance to practice law.
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