Monday, July 30, 2012

Appalling Fourth Tier Trash Pit: Appalachian School of Law

This is the actual name of the law school, and it is located in Grundy, Virginia. Yes, it is fully accredited by the cockroaches and dung beetles at the American Bar Association.

Tuition: Full-time students who begin their studies at this “world class” institution in 2012 will face a bill of $31,525 - in tuition and fees - for the upcoming school year. To be fair, the commode guarantees this bargain basement price for the duration of one’s time at the law school, provided that you do not take time off or drop to part-time status.

Total Cost of Attendance: According to this same document, indirect costs will add another $21,600 to the big-ass tab. The toilet explicitly mentions that car repairs and auto insurance are not taken into account, when determining COA. Also, apparently these students will be required to hand over $2,400 for a “summer externship.” For $ome rea$on, that is not considered a direct expense.

Seeing that ABA-approved diploma mills do not provide twelve month costs, we will need to prorate the costs for housing, food, utilities, transportation, and personal expenses. With these adjustments, indirect expenses will amount to $26,566. As such, we reach a total, estimated COA of $58,091 - for 2012-2013. Isn’t it nice to see someone providing “affordable legal education” to this dirt poor region?!?!

Ranking: Are you planning to apply to this “institution of higher learning”?! If so, you may want to learn about its reputation. US “News” & World Report lists Appalachian Sewer of Law as a fourth tier pile of corrosive garbage. Of course, Pussy Bob Morse prefers to employ the term “Rank Not Published,” for this group. Do you still want to enroll in this trash pit?

Pathetic Employment Placement: The bitches and hags at this school did not bother to publish this data on their site. Instead, we glean this information from the LST clearinghouse. According to this database, only 30.8% of this commode’s recent grads secured long-term, full time legal employment. By the way, this figure includes desperate solo practitioners. Who wouldn’t want to spend three years of their lives - and incur a mountain a NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt - for such outcomes?!?!

Projected Debt Owed at First Loan Payment: Evidently, this school did not furnish its average law student indebtedness - for its Class of 2011 - to US “News.” For this reason, we rely on a link from Law School Transparency. As the site notes, this does not take scholarships into account. Based on their calculations, LST estimates that a member of ASL’s Class of 2015 could face up to $188,321 in student debt for law school. If that potential outcome doesn’t make your heart skip a few beats, then you may need someone to check your pulse.

Faculty and Administrator Pay: Let’s see how well the pigs are doing, in stark contrast to their students and graduates. Relying on this private toilet’s 2011 Form 990, we can see that Taxpayer ID 54-1743079 had a mere $24,637,682 in end-of-year net assets - as of June 30, 2011. In the context of U.S. “higher education,” that is a small sum. No wonder this pile of excrement landed on Law School Death Watch.

On page 6, note that Clinton Shinn, dean of the law school, raked in $275,186 in TOTAL COMPENSATION. Yes, this academic received $243,566 in base salary, as well as $31,620 in estimated amount of other compensation from the organization and other related organizations. The following figures also pertain to total income:

Sandra McLothlin “earned” $124,571 as associate dean for academic affairs and “associate law professor.” Paula Young raked in $111,968 as an “associate professor.” Dale Rubin made $133,723, for teaching administrative law, state and local government, employment law, and corporate governance. Lastly, Charles Condon pulled in $139,241 - as the damn director of the law library!

On Campus Shooting by a Mentally Ill Law Student - on January 16, 2002 - Resulted in Three Dead Victims:

Check out this CNN article from January 17, 2002. The piece was titled "Suspect in law school shootings arraigned." Please read the entire story. Here is one of the key excerpts, from this report:

"Peter Odighizuwa, 43, did not enter a plea. A judge ordered a attorney appointed for him and set a court date for March 21.

Authorities said that Odighizuwa, who had flunked out of law school, opened fire with a .380 semiautomatic handgun just after 1 p.m. ET Wednesday. 

One of those killed was the dean of Appalachian School of Law, L. Anthony Sutin, 42 - a former acting assistant U.S. attorney general.
Killed along with Sutin were another faculty member, professor Thomas Blackwell, 41, and a student, Angela Denise Dales, 33, according to state police." [Emphasis mine]

Conclusion: Appalachian Sewer of Law is a pathetic, vile stench pile. If you are working in a call center, and making $11 an hour, you should not give up that job in order to enroll at this toxic garbage heap. You are better off in that position than an unemployed, heavily indebted TTTT grad living in your mother’s basement. Look at the numbers, lemming. You will not have a shot of landing Biglaw, as a graduate of this mill. In fact, you will have difficulty finding legal work. Also, non-legal employers are not too keen on hiring JDs- as they typically view them as litigious or combative. This school is such a piece of trash, you may need to field questions such as “Did you earn your law degree from an accredited institution?” and “Is that an online school?”

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Profiles in Academic Swindling: Erwin Chemerinsky, Dean of Dung Heap University of California, Irvine School of Law

Chemerinsky Defends the Cost of “Legal Education”:

On July 23, 2012, the National Law Journal printed Chemerinsky’s self-serving drivel. The piece was entitled “You get what you pay for in legal education.” It was intended to be a retort to Brian Tamanaha’s new book, Failing Law Schools. Here are some key excerpts:

“Tamanaha is correct that law professors are paid significantly more than university faculty in disciplines like English, philosophy and history. Imagine that a law school tried to pay at that level, say roughly half of current faculty salaries at top law schools. Who would come and teach at a school where they got paid half what other law schools would pay them, and who would stay there when other opportunities arose?” 

Nice straw man argument, douche-bag. You can thank the American Bar Association for engaging in price-fixing of tenured “professor” salaries. Without these controls in place, tell me that someone re-hashing Carbolic Smoke Ball or Pennoyer would inherently be worth $190K per year. Recall that the U.S. Department of Justice sued the ABA for violating the Sherman Antitrust Act, via the law school accreditation process - in 1995.

“The Complaint alleges that the ABA restrained competition among professional personnel at ABA-approved law schools by fixing their compensation levels and working conditions, and by limiting competition from non-ABA-approved schools.”

Ass-hat Chemerinsky continued:

“Cutting a law faculty in half would require relying far more on relatively low-cost adjunct faculty. Tamanaha's assumption is that relying on practitioners rather than professors to teach more classes won't compromise the quality of the education students receive. Here I think he is just wrong. There are certainly some spectacular adjunct professors at every law school, and they play a vital role. But as I see each year when I read the student evaluations at my school, overall the evaluations for the full-time faculty are substantially better than they are for the adjuncts. It is easy to understand why. Teaching is a skill, and most people get better the more they do it. Moreover, full-time faculty generally have more time to prepare than adjunct professors who usually have busy practices.

Adjunct faculty are available far less for students than full-time faculty. Tamanaha gives no weight to the substantial learning that occurs outside of the classroom. I think he tremendously underestimates the amount that most faculty are around the school and available to students.” [Emphasis mine]

Erwin, most tenured “professors” are too busy reading the Wall Street Journal and watching Youtube videos to be bothered during office hours. By the way, the very best instructors at my third tier law school were adjuncts. They knew how to explain the nuts and bolts of practice. As you stated in your article, moron: most people become better at the tasks that they perform regularly. You can’t expect those who practiced law for 12 minutes to be able to teach students how to become lawyers.

Coverage of Chemerinsky’s Garbage Defense:

On July 24, 2012, Paul Campos punched UC Irvine in the ass with an entry labeled “The absurdity of UC Irvine.” Look at this killer opening:

“A few years ago, somebody decided it would be a good thing for the University of California to open another law school. Now even a few years ago this was obviously a terrible idea.  Today . . . well.

So it has come to pass that UC-Irvine's dean, Erwin Chemerinsky, has taken to the pages of the National Law Journal to explain why it's actually a good thing that the dumpster fire that is the California market for new (and old) attorneys has now been supplemented by another law school. And not just another law school, but one that will charge nearly $47,000 this year in resident tuition and fees, and $53,000 to non-residents, while conveniently located smack in the middle of one of the most expensive places to live in the USA…

But a funny thing happened on the way to the apologia: Chemerinsky's article is around a thousand words long, and exactly none of them are dedicated to explaining either why California needs a new law school or whether that school is worth anything like the cost of attending it. 

Instead, the article is dedicated to the proposition that it's impossible - literally impossible - to provide a "quality" legal education for much less than the mind-boggling price UCI is charging for this increasingly less in demand product.” [Emphasis mine]

The Swine’s Background:

Prior to becoming dean at the new turd, Chemerinsky was best known as the editor of the five pound piece of trash casebook Constitutional Law. At least, if you were ever confronted by an assailant in the parking lot, you could pull out that text and beat them to death with the damn thing. The man is also recognized as someone who believes the legal $y$tem can produce "social justice."  Take a look at this quote from his faculty bio page:

“I was inspired to go to law school by the civil rights lawyers of the 1950s and 1960s and how they transformed society. I continue to believe that law is the most powerful tool for social change.”

One wonders whether strapping young people down with $170K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt fits under the bastard’s definition of “social change.” If anything, such outcomes merely serve the status quo – as indentured debt slaves are unlikely to ever challenge their pig-headed bosses or social constructs.

Conclusion: In the last analysis, Erwin Chemersinky is FULLY AWARE that many law schools are having difficulty filling their seats for the upcoming Fall semester. He knows that his school is an expensive joke. Furthermore, California did not need one more ABA-accredited trash pit. Yet, the school was approved and opened its doors. In his op-ed, Chemerinsky also attempted to justify the cost of law school by noting that it reflects the increase in undergrad tuition. However, for $ome rea$on, he failed to mention that most universities are relying more heavily on adjunct and associate faculty. Chemerinsky also did not inform his readers that law schools do not require massive infrastructure costs, as most research is performed online. Also, when one simply utters “I think he is just wrong,” you KNOW that the person has no real case and no argument. This rat had carefully built up a reputation as an outspoken liberal intellectual. In the end, it always comes down to money with these academic pigs.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Profiles in Political Expediency: Cockroach Gordon Jay Quist Tosses Out the Consumer Suit Against Thomas M. Cooley Law School

Cockroach Gordon Jay Quist in the Advanced Stages of Shriveled Balls Syndrome:

In the picture above, the piece of trash appears to be constipated.  Perhaps, Quist did not have his recommended daily amount of fiber and prunes when this picture was taken.  The link below leads you to the 22 page opinion, issued by Cockroach Gordon Jay Quist. From the top of page two:

“[I]n this Court’s judgment, the MCPA does not apply to the purchase of a legal education to attain employment, Count I does not state a claim for which relief can be granted. Counts 2 and 3 are dismissed because one representation is literally true and because Plaintiffs unreasonably relied upon the representations that comprise Plaintiffs’ misrepresentation claims. Therefore, Cooley’s motion will be granted and Plaintiffs’ amended complaint will be dismissed.”

Notice how this ball-less, spineless corporate hand puppet issued his opinion granting Cooley’s motion to dismiss on a Friday. He realized that the news cycle would refresh on Monday morning, and items published at the end of the week prior would be overlooked. How do think he earned his politician’s robe?!?!

“Of course, every one of these “reasons” relies upon the assumption that Cooley graduates’ employment statistics move in correlation with overall market statistics.”

On the bottom of page four, we can see that this ancient pig dismissed the Plaintiffs’ complaint quickly. Back in June 2011, Economic Modeling Specialists, Inc. estimated that there will be 862 annual attorney openings in the state of Michigan, from 2010-2015. However, a total of 1,024 people passed the Michigan bar exam in 2009. Do you see how that presents a problem for recent TTTT grads in your state, Moron Gordon Jay Quist?!?!

Read this portion of the swine’s opinion, which appears on pages 17 and 18:

“Last, Plaintiffs unreasonably relied solely upon the two statistics in the Employment Reports when enrolling or deciding to remain enrolled at Cooley. This Court agrees with Judge Schwietzer, a judge for the New York Supreme Court in a nearly identical case, for some of the reasons he discusses as to why reliance upon the two statistics would be unreasonable. See Gomez-Jimenez v. New York Law Sch. This Court does not necessarily agree that college graduates are particularly sophisticated in making career or business decisions. Sometimes hope and dreams triumph over experience and common sense. Nevertheless, it would be unreasonable for Plaintiffs to rely on two bare-bones statistics in deciding to attend a bottom-tier law school with the lowest admission standards in the country. In addition, “[i]t is widely accepted that American law schools, Cooley included, employ all sorts of legerdemain to boost employment rates in a contracting legal market[.] [Internal citations removed and emphasis mine]

Since it’s now widely accepted that ABA-accredited schools, including fourth tier trash pits, falsely increase placement rates, then it was unreasonable for past graduates to rely on the school’s published data. In the end, this piece of garbage engaged in “legal gymnastics” in order to “justify” his gutless decision.

This Decision Was Fully Expected:

On June 14, 2012, the Wall Street Journal published a piece by Chelsea Phipps, which was entitled “Judge: Graduates Face ‘Uphill Battle’ in Lawsuit against Cooley.” Here is one telling excerpt from that article:

“At the June 5 hearing, Gordon J. Quist sided with the graduates on several issue. He brushed aside Cooley’s contention that the lawsuits should really be aimed at the American Bar Association and NALP, who make the rules on reporting job-placement statistics. 

“Regarding the ABA and NALP standards, they’re a floor not a ceiling,” [Cockroach] Quist said in the hearing. 

But on the larger issue of whether Cooley’s advertised job-placement figures could have violated the Michigan Consumer Protection Act, the school seemed to have the upper hand. 

“I don’t see that it’s a consumer issue,” [Quist] told Jesse Strauss, who represents the plaintiffs, in the hearing. “The fraud count — I think you’ve got an uphill battle.” 

“Even in your own statement you say they wanted to, in essence, get jobs in the legal profession and become high-skilled and high paid lawyers in some law firms.” [Quist] said. “To me, that’s a business reason as distinguished from a consumer protection reason.” [Emphasis mine]

Coverage of the Bastard’s Decision:

On July 20, 2012, the Wall Street Journal published an article by Chelsea Phipps, under the headline “Cooley Law Grads’ Lawsuit Dismissed.”

“The former Cooley Law grads were seeking $250 million in damages, claiming they decided to attend Cooley based on what they said was misinformation from the school. Law Blog reported on the case here.

But [corporate bagman] Gordon Quist, who got the case, wasn’t buying it. The court dismissed lawsuit on the grounds that purchasing a legal degree is not protected by the Michigan Consumer Protection Act.

Even if it was, the job numbers at stake were “literally true” whether they differentiated between recent grads in legal jobs vs. non-legal jobs or not, the court stated, adding that the grads “unreasonably relied upon the representations” in question in their law school decision.”

Isn’t it funny to see a supposed “judge” defend his decision from several angles?! This is one of the devils' favorite tactics.  Look at the comments section of this piece. Most of those readers understand why this decision was reached.

Also on July 20th, Brian McVicar wrote a piece for Michigan Live labeled “Buyer beware: Why judge dismissed federal lawsuit against Cooley Law School.” Here is a portion of that entry:

“U.S. District [Pig] Gordon Quist granted Cooley’s motion to dismiss, saying that while the school’s employment and salary figures were “vague and incomplete,” the students should have relied on more than statistics when making their decision to enroll.

“Plaintiffs and prospective students should have approached their decision to enter into law school with extreme caution given the size of the investment,” Quist wrote. “With red flags waiving and cautionary bells ringing, an ordinary prudent person would not have relied on the statistics to decide to spend $100,000 or more.” [Emphasis mine]

Once again, it is clear that college graduates are not “sophisticated consumers.” By the way, this idiotic reporter failed to understand the real reason behind the dung beetle’s decision: law schools are the gateway to the “profession.” If those donning foolish black robes start ruling against these profitable “institutions of higher learning,” then the whole house of cards may come crumbling down. Recognize that “judges” are NOT going to grow a spine, especially when it comes to a system that has rewarded them so well.

Conclusion: One wonders whether this 75 year old ass-hat will be invited to speak at a future Cooley gathering - or receive some other form of acknowledgement - for his work in defending this fourth tier sewage pit. In the final analysis, we cannot expect a judicial or legislative “solution” to this problem. Perhaps, a member of Congre$$ will occasionally lecture the ABA on how to run its business - but this is merely for public consumption, i.e. “I do care about the students and graduates.” A politician in a black robe may point out that law schools lie - but then the rat will quickly add, “It’s understood that law schools lie about employment figures. As a student, you should know better than to rely on the school’s data.” Better-educated consumers will lead to fewer people enrolling in law schools, and this may cause some sorely-needed school closures.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Miserable Fourth Tier Meconium: University of Memphis Cecil C. Humphreys School of Law

Tuition: Tennessee residents attending this trash pit on a full-time basis were charged $15,710 in tuition and fees – for the 2011-2012 school year. For $ome rea$on, these hags and bitches have not yet provided costs for the upcoming academic year. Out-of-state, full-time law students were hit with a big-ass bill of $37,582 in tuition and fees – for 2011-2012.

Total Estimated Cost of Attendance: According to this same document, room and board; books/supplies; transportation; and miscellaneous expenses will add another $15,705 to the tab. Of course, the pigs base this figure off a nine-month academic calendar.

Prorating these figures – other than books and supplies – this amount reaches $20,235. Seeing that actual law students will require living expenses over twelve months, we come up with a more accurate total estimated COA - for 2011-2012 - of $57,817 for non-resident, full-time law students, whereas in-state, full-time students faced total charges of $35,945. Isn’t it nice to see public commodes providing such affordable “education”?!?!

Ranking: At such prices, this school must be prestigious, right?!?! If you applied to this sewage pit with such hopes, then go in the kitchen and make yourself a sandwich. You can also skip over the next sentence. US “News” & World Report lists the University of Memphis Cecil C. Humphreys Sewer of Law among the moist fourth tier of U.S. law schools! Certainly, good things await these TTTT graduates.

Supposed Employment Placement Rate: This garbage heaps makes the following grammatically-incorrect claim: “88.8% of the Class of 2011 were employed nine months after graduation.”

Also, notice that there were 129 members of the Univer$iTTTy of Memphi$ JD Class of 2011 – and that only 95 reported being employed. Furthermore, only 65 respondents were in positions requiring bar admission. In essence, only half of this class ended up in jobs where a law license was required.

Take a look at the chart labeled “Class of 2011 Employed by Law Firm Size.” Fully 30 grads were in firms of 2-10 lawyers. Roughly seven desperate fools went into solo practice. How do you like those results, lemming?!?! For $ome rea$on, the toilet did not even bother to furnish starting salary info, for this cohort.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: US “News” lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the University of Memphis JD Class of 2011 who incurred debt for law school - as $70,025. Fully 78 percent of this school’s 2011 class took on such toxic debt. Keep in mind that this is one of the most “affordable” law schools in the nation. Furthermore, his figure does not take undergraduate debt into account.

Administrator and Faculty Salary Data: Let’s head to this link from the Commercial Appeal and see how well the pigs are compensated. The figures below are from the 2011-2012 column - although some commenters indicated that the numbers are three years old:

Kevin Smith, dean of this pile of rot, was paid $226,600 for his “work.” By the way, this butter cow even earned a Bachelor’s degree from Drake University in 1977. Andrew Jay McClurg raked in $220,120 - in his role as the ridiculously-named “professor and Herbert Herff Chair of Excellence in Law.”

The State of Tennessee Tosses $42 Million Down the Toilet to Relocate this School:

Head to this page to look at this fundraising campaign, which the commode named “Countdown to Downtown”:

“The Cecil C Humphreys School is raising 12 million dollars in private support from graduates, friends, foundations, law firms, and other sources. $6 million dollars relocated the post office and the remaining $6 million will fund endowments to support student scholarships, faculty professorships, and academic initiatives. The State of Tennessee allocated an unprecedented $42 million toward the renovation of the historic custom house, federal courthouse and most recently post office.” [Emphasis mine]

Clearly these funds have been put to better use. The State of Tennessee set aside $42 million in order to relocate this fourth tier trash can. Apparently, the state wants to make sure that the legal market will remain over-saturated.

Conclusion: The University of Memphis Cecil C. Humphreys School of Law is a pathetic toilet that is NOT run for the benefit of the paying customers, i.e. students and graduates. You will not be served well by incurring an additional $75K-$120K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt. The “professors” and administrators are paid up front, in full – while YOU, the student and graduate, will repay these loans with interest, for the next 20-30 years. If this garbage can still sounds enticing to you, then dig in, moron. Perhaps, you enjoy drinking from the toilet. If so, then go ahead and enroll in this rot pile.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Profiles in Rancid Self-Interest: Don LeDuc, “President” of Thomas M. Cooley Law School, Argues That Aging Attorneys Will Lead to Shortage of Lawyers in Michigan

Don LeDuc Claims to “Believe” That His State Will Soon Face an Attorney Deficit:

On July 9, 2012, Washtenaw County Legal News published a piece from Tom Gantert under the headline “Cooley head: Aging attorney population to create many jobs.” Here is the opening from that article:

“The President of Cooley Law School believes the state has reached a "tipping point" where the number of older attorneys leaving practice will exceed the number of law students entering the market.

Don LeDuc said he believes the state will be in "deficit mode" where there are more jobs than lawyers for about 20 years.

"There's such talk about too many lawyers and no jobs," LeDuc said. "In two or three years, we will be producing fewer new admissions to membership than the numbers leaving membership in the same year." 

Cooley Law School graduated 996 lawyers in 2011 and 918 in 2010, according to James Robb, associate dean for development and alumni relations at Cooley.

LeDuc points to a demographics report put out by the State Bar of Michigan that found 53.4 percent of the active members of the state bar were born before 1961. The survey also found that 11.1 percent (or about 3,716 lawyers) of the active bar members were born before 1944.” [Emphasis mine]

Sure, the legal job market is going to soon face a shortage of lawyers – and Jessica Alba just climbed on top of me. By the way, those of us in the real work world recognize that Boomers do not plan to retire anytime soon. Hell, read this Esquire piece from Stephen Marche, which was posted on March 26, 2012. The feature was entitled “The War Against Youth.” Check out this passage:

“Nobody ever talks about generational conflict. Who wants to bring up that the old are eating the young at the dinner table? How are you going to mention that to your boss? If you're a politician, how are you going to tell your donors? Even the Occupy Wall Street crowd - while rejecting the modes and rhetoric and institutional support of Boomer progressives - shied away from articulating the fundamental distinction that fills their spaces with crowds: young against old.” [Emphasis in original]

Why Would an “Educator” Believe Such Nonsense?!:

On July 11, 2012, Paul Campos called this liar out on his blog entry labeled "Life is a carnival."  Read this biting commentary:

“Now LeDuc -- who got paid $523,000 by Cooley in 2009 per IRS Form 990 – is basically just a carnival barker with a law degree, but his style of argumentation is all too typical of the things that pass for knowledge in much of both legal academia and the legal profession. (I recently heard a high-ranking member of the Colorado legal establishment make a similarly absurd argument about a looming lawyer shortage brought on by imminent boomer retirements).

LeDuc, like so many other people in this thing of ours, is an unabashed grifter, making up on the fly whatever argument he thinks might work on his target audience, while ignoring evidence, logic, and any constraints that might be generated by a sense of honor or the ability to feel shame.” [Emphasis mine]

As you can see, this academic swindler/pig has many rea$on$ to put forth such rubbish. If prospective law students understand the economics of the legal “profession” – prior to enrolling – then they may choose to forego law school altogether. This would result in fewer victims for Cooley and other ABA-accredited garbage pits.

The Numbers Reflect Reality and Refute LeDuc's Baseless Claim:

On June 27, 2011, the New York Times Economix blog published Catherine Rampell’s story “The Lawyer Surplus, State by State.”

For the years 2010-2015, EMSI estimates that there will be 862 annual attorney openings in the state of Michigan. However, a total of 1,024 people passed the Michigan bar exam in 2009. This represents a surplus of 162 lawyers for that state. These numbers were compiled by Economic Modeling Specialists, Inc. They were not furnished by $elf-intere$ted law school cockroaches, or from another highly-motivated group.

Conclusion: Paul Campos is correct in his assessment of Don LeDuc: he is merely trying to get as many asses into seats as possible. The law school pigs are FULLY AWARE of the shrinking legal job market facing current students and recent graduates. They cannot claim ignorance. The “professors” and administrators read articles documenting the glutted industry. What do you think those ass-clowns do in their offices – actual work?!?!

Tellingly, Don LeDuc did not provide ANY statistics or facts to back up his garbage argument. Furthermore, he has many reasons for deceiving optimistic lemmings. In sum, when someone has that much money riding on the outcome - and no foundation for his beliefs - then you cannot take their words as anything more than an asinine sales pitch. Lastly, if you are considering attending law school - and you see yourself as a future attorney - then be confident in that part of your brain that applies basic logic and common sense. Are you going to listen to a self-interested swine who has no evidence to support his assertion - or will you rely on the facts?

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Third Tier Waste Heap: West Virginia University College of Law

Tuition: Since the pathetic bitches at this public sewer only provide 2010-2011 tuition rates, we need to head to another location for this info. According to US “News” & World Report, in-state, full-time tuition will amount to $16,423 for the 2012-2013 school year. Nonresidents attending this trash pit on a full-time basis will face a bill of $31,367 - for 2012-2013. It’s good to see that public toilets are providing low-cost alternatives to students, right?!?!

Ranking: At such prohibitive costs, surely this public “institution of higher learning” must have one hell of a reputation in the legal and academic communities! If you believe this and you don’t want your faith shattered, then skip the rest of this paragraph and make yourself a sandwich. As you can see, US “News” lists West Virginia University Commode of Law as the 101st greatest, most prestigious and marvelous law school in the entire nation! It shares this honorable rating with the following garbage heaps: St. Louis University, TTTexa$ TTTech Univer$iTTTy, University of the Pacific, and Villanova “University.”

Supposed Employment Placement Statistics: According to this commode, 93.5% of the JD Class of 2011 was employed within nine months of graduation. Allegedly, 61.2 percent of these graduates ended up in private practice.

Apparently, the school has nothing against counting JDs working at the Brass Alley Pub - or as a claims adjuster for State Farm - as “employed.” Of course, these bastards and cockroaches constantly lecture students on the importance of “ethics” and “avoiding even the appearance of impropriety.” For $ome rea$on, these principles do not apply to the law schools.

Average Law Student Indebtedness: USN&WR lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the We$TTT Virginia Univer$iTTTy JD Class of 2011 who incurred debt for law school - as $70,078. Furthermore, 86 percent of this school’s 2011 class took on such toxic debt. This figure does not take undergraduate debt into account.

Administrator and Faculty Salary Info: Let’s take a glance at how well the academic hustlers/thieves are doing, in contrast to their debt-strapped students and graduates. The Herald-Dispatch lists salaries for the 2007 calendar year. Keep in mind that these figures are not comprehensive, i.e. they likely do not include bonuses or other compensation. Enter the last name of the pigs listed below, as well as university under Department:

Joyce McConnell, now dean of the commode, made $194,048.46 in salary. David Hardesty, “president” emeritus and “professor of law,” raked in $181,659.34. Ass-Clown Gerald Ashdown “earned” $146,054.10 - as something comically referred to as “James H. "Buck" and June M. Harless professor of law.” Robert Bastress rolled around in $141,729.60.

These are very handsome salaries for Appalachia, especially considering that these figures are five years old. Remember that the bastards have easy-ass teaching schedules. Plus, the swine do not train students how to practice law!

“WVU Law promotes public service through the Center for Law and Public Service, which encourages students to engage in public interest law, fosters dialogue about current legal services and policy issues, and helps students to become leaders who seek creative solutions for achieving equal access to justice. The Center offers multiple avenues including externships, public service fellowships, and volunteer service opportunities.” [Emphasis mine]

The pigs act as if they are pumping out graduates with the ability and financial independence to go out and save the world. This takes cynicism to another level. Recent graduates weighed down with a mortgage of NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt are unable to engage in these endeavors - to any great extent. The school simply wants to exploit these students further, with “externships” and unpaid “placements.”

Conclusion: West Virginia University Commode of Law is a rancid waste pile that operates for the benefit of “professors,” staff and administrators. The students are a mere means to an end, i.e. big-ass salaries for cushy jobs. The administrators and faculty are paid up front, in full. YOU, the student and graduate, will be left holding the bag of NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt. Furthermore, you will not be equipped to actually practice law - especially when opposed by competent, experienced attorneys. Despite what the shills claim, hanging a shingle upon graduation is foolish. Well-established attorneys and firms can blow your ass out of the water, with their advertising alone. In addition, they actually know what the hell they are doing - with regards to this “profession.” If you still like your odds, then you may be a hopeless gambling fiend.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Profiles in Rampant Dishonesty: Victoria Pynchon of Solo Practice University

Lemming Compares Law School to a Golden Ticket:

Writing for ForbesWoman, Victoria Pynchon allowed a guest post from an idiot who will start law school in Fall 2012. The piece is entitled “Is Law School Still a Golden Ticket?” Read this pathetic opening:

“Whatever anyone says, I want my Golden Ticket.

That’s why I’ve decided to go to law school.

Like little Charlie Bucket in Willie Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, I believe my golden ticket is my big chance to make my way.

Against popular opinion, and even the American Bar Association’s reports on the unemployment rate for newly minted J.D.s, I still romantically believe that law school has value and presents opportunities I may not have otherwise.”

If your son or daughter is this na├»ve and stupid in middle school, then you seriously need to re-assess how you raised your kid. Then, open the trunk of your car, grab a lug nut wrench, and smack yourself over the head with it 10-15 times. In the event that your child is this damn dumb as a college graduate, do the world a favor and shoot yourself. You have clearly failed as a parent and mentor, and you have nothing to offer this world. Yet, for $ome rea$on, Cockroach Melvin Schweitzer feels that this group, i.e. college grads, is comprised of “sophisticated consumers.”

Jessi Freud, plenty of people attended law school, in order to help “the little guy.” Not everyone enrolled wants to fellate/represent the plethora of corporate pigs and criminals in this nation. However, you need to realize that you will be defending broke bastards, deadbeats, and bums. Is that how you want to subsist?!?! The biggest problem is that roughly 200 ABA-accredited law school diploma mills are pumping out FAR TOO MANY GRADS, for the available number of attorney openings, each year!!

Critical Coverage of Pynchon’s Article:

On June 21, 2012, Paul Campos posted an entry labeled “A brief note for Jessi Freud et. al.” Check out Pynchon’s comment to readers, which LawProf correctly describes as “Pynchon [advising] aspiring lawyers to commit malpractice in order to learn their trade”:

“You try your first case alone with butterflies in your stomach, your hands shaking and your armpits sweating. One old grizzled defense attorney told me that if you didn’t gag over your toothbrush the first day of trial, you shouldn’t be trying cases anymore; you’d lost your edge. You enroll at Solo Practice University. You join Bar associations. You stay up all night reading. You pick up the telephone and ask for help. You start with small cases. You’re not representing people in capital murder cases. There’s not that much you can screw up. Just don’t blow the statute of limitations.” [Emphasis in original]

Why would this dumbass encourage newly-minted lawyers to enroll in $olo Practice Univer$ity?!?!

The Swine’s Background:

“Victoria is an attorney-mediator with experience in complex commercial litigation and trial advocacy. She will teach a course called 'The Art of the Deposition' at Solo Practice University®.” [Emphasis mine]

As you can see, Pynchon the Shill works for this company. What a beacon of integrity, huh?!?! Surely, that is not a conflict of interest.

Does anyone else notice the strong resemblance to the two-headed bitch named Kimber Russell?

Check out this comical clip from Pynchon's bio:

“After a 25-year commercial litigation career, Victoria earned her legal masters degree in dispute resolution from the world-famous Straus Institute at Pepperdine University School of Law. The knowledge, wisdom and skills she gained at Straus can be found in her two books on dispute resolution, The Grownups' ABCs of Conflict Resolution (Reason Press, 2010) and Success as a Mediator for Dummies (Wiley, 2012).”

Yes, readers of this blog are fully aware of the “prestigious” nature of Pepperdine University Sewer of Law. Who wouldn’t want to enroll in a grossly overpriced toilet affiliated with the Churche$ of Chri$t?!?!

Conclusion: Jessi Frued is a well-meaning fool. The main point is that it is intellectually dishonest and irresponsible for Victoria Pynchon – who is associated with Solo Practice University – to encourage such a person to pursue their moronic goals. If a friend or family member told me that they were going to quit their decent, secure job – in order to pursue their dream of becoming a Hollywood actor or chess grandmaster – I would explain to them that their goals are unrealistic and not attainable. If they insisted in their stupidity, I would then grab that person by the scruff of the neck and shake the hell out of him.

Perhaps, the comparison of a “legal education” to a golden ticket is fitting. After all, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a work of fantasy. The novel was written for children. If you earnestly believe that a law degree from Fourth Tier Nova Southeastern University is a ticket to a better life, then you truly are crazier than Gene Wilder, in his portrayal of the fictional Willy Wonka.
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