Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Third Tier Buffalo Waste: University of Montana School of Law


Tuition: Montana residents attending this dung heap on a full-time basis will be charged $11,334.76 in tuition and fees – for the 2014-2015 school year. Out-of-state, full-time law students will be bent over a coffee table – to the tune of $29,327.56 for 2014-2015. What a great deal, huh?!?!

Total Cost of Attendance: According to this same page, living expenses will add another $12,131 to the tab. Transportation will amount to another $1,400 and books will cost $1,200. Parking is $185 per year also. Apparently, real estate in Missoula is at a premium. The total, estimated COA for in-state students are listed as $26,056.76 – whereas nonresident students will be slapped with a budget of $44,758.56.

Keep in mind that ABA-accredited cesspools only consider living expenses on a nine month academic calendar. Seeing that actual law students will require costs over the full 12 months, we will prorate living expenses. After making this adjustment, we reach the following, more accurate COA figures: $30,294.76 for Montana residents and $48,987.56 for out-of-state fools. I included the parking pass in this assessment. Unless, of course, you prefer to ride your bike through freezing-ass weather, chump. 


Ranking: At these prices, one would expect this school to have a solid reputation among lawyers and academic swine. However, US “News” & World Report rates the Univer$iTTTy of MonTTTana Sewer of Law as the 121st greatest, most remarkable and magnificent law school in the entire damn country. In fact, it shares this distinct honor with the following SEVEN toilets: Campbell “University”; DePaul; Duquesne; Hamline UniversiTTTy; the University of Akron; Arkansas-Little Rock; and Willamette. What an incredible feat!


Employment “Placement” Statistics: Let’s take a peek at the commode’s ABA Employment Summary for 2013 Graduates. As you can see, there were 81 members of this class. Of that amount, a total of 56 men and women were able to secure full-time, long-term jobs “requiring bar passage.” Overall, 67 JDs reported that they were employed within nine months of graduation. This leads to a placement rate of 82.7 percent, i.e. 67/81.

Under Employment Type, you will notice that only 29 of these graduates were hired by private legal offices. This includes one desperate-ass sole practitioner, 18 people working in firms of 2-10 lawyers, and four grads employed by an office with 11-25 attorneys. One damn person - out of the 81 – landed a position with a law firm that has 251-500 lawyers. Do you still like your odds, Lemming?!?!


Who cares about such outcomes, right?!?!  After all, the bitches and hags at Career Services will allegedly “assist you with the development of your resume and cover letters.” They will also notify of positions within the law school. Lastly, the thieves will “present career workshops throughout the academic year, helping you to develop job search skills and to become acquainted with the myriad of employment opportunities open to a J.D.” Can you believe that applicants or students buy into this nonsense?! 


Average Law Student Indebtedness: US “News” lists the average law student indebtedness - for those members of the UniversiTTTy of MonTTTana JD Class of 2013 who incurred debt for law school - as $74,614. Hell, 91% of this garbage pit’s 2013 cohort took on such toxic debt. While this may not strike you as a monstrous figure, it is significant. Don’t forget that this amount does not include undergraduate debt – and also does not take accrued interest into account, while the student is enrolled. Plus, salaries tend to be lower in this state.


Garbage Journal Opportunities: As a student at this third tier toilet, you will have a chance to write onto the revered, hallowed Public Land & Resources Law Review! From the journal’s description:

The Public Land & Resources Law Review is published by a board of student editors at The University of Montana School of Law. We feature professional scholarship and student-written articles exploring legal issues regarding public land, natural resource, environmental, and federal Indian law. This site hosts our annual conference material, summaries on recent court decisions, and the archive of our previous journals.” [Emphasis in original]

If you ever mention that you are a student ediTTTor of this publication to anyone in a local bar or restaurant, then you may never pay for another drink or steak again – as long as you stay in the area. Then again, no out-of-state employers really want to hire Montana Law grads anyway. 


The Lawyer Glut in Montana: Catherine Rampell’s excellent piece, “The Lawyer Surplus, State by State,” appeared in the New York Times Economix blog – back on June 27, 2011. Based on research from consulting firm Economic Modeling Specialists Inc., the state of Montana has too damn many attorneys. Here are the numbers from that report:

2010-2015 Estimated Annual Openings: 81
2009 Bar Exam Passers: 163
Surplus: 82

Conclusion: Avoid this corroded outhouse UNLESS you have the right last name or do not mind practicing law in a tiny community. Otherwise, you are wasting your time and energy on a foolish pursuit. You will not be served well by incurring an additional $80K-$110K in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt for a TTT law degree. In the final analysis, the “professors” and administrators at this dung heap do not care about YOUR future. They are only concerned with keeping their overpaid, underworked positions. You are a mere means to an end, i.e. federally-backed student loans.


  1. Highest ranked law school in the state. But that's not saying much.

    1. About as prestigious as being the smartest retard on the short bus.

  2. The tuition isn't as outrageous as some of the schools Nando writes about, but there aren't any biglaw jobs in MT, either. The closest market with a significant biglaw presence is where, Denver? I bet you could count the MT law grads that start at a salary higher than 60k on one hand.

    Verdict: Go only if you want to be a small law or state gov't lawyer in Montana and you get a significant scholarship, 3/4 or better if you are paying the out of state sucker rate.

  3. You'd better know somebody if you go to school out there.

    Someone who can and definitely will hook you into State/Local/Fed. gov't. Or some established firm that's solid.

    Otherwise, your options will be extremely limited as well as your legal career.

  4. So you'll be taking out about $80K+ for a law degree from this place. Let's say you have $25K in loans from undergrad. (That's pretty reasonable and probably low.) So now you're up to $105K. And that's before we add in interest.

    See where this is going? You're only prospects are in MT. No Biglaw. No magical 'midlaw.' So you're stuck hoping to make $50K per year. Yeah. Have fun paying off $120K+ on a 40K-50K job. And pray you keep it.

  5. [I just want this to be on Nando's blog, somewhere.]

    Illinois Attorney here.

    The Illinois Bar Journal, November 2014, Vol 102, No. 11, must read articles:
    1. Is Discharging Student Loan Debt In Bankruptcy Getting Easier?, by Paul B. Porvaznik.

    2. Are We Ready For 'Practice Ready'? [sic] by Hon. Ron Spears.

    3. 2014 Compensation & Benefits Survey 5 Key Findings by Timothy A. Slating. (Key finding, in Illinois, based on respondents' info, annual income from 0$ to $149,000 comprises 6% of the attorneys in Illinois.)

  6. Why does that pile of shit resemble King Kong?

  7. This country is regressing to the social structure of England Pre industrial revolution. Basically the halves with inherited family wealth, and connections to enter closely held business or law firms (e.g. an economic aristocracy) or the 1-2% who are intellectually equipped for medicine or engineering (or via HLS/T7 to big law firms). All others are doomed to an increasingly dour lower middle class subsistence life slowly eroded by global wage pressure. Of course some diligent souls will bootstrap into corporate middle management, but how long until these positions are taken over by even more diligent Easter Europeans and Asians? The exception will be the higher education scammers in the Professoriate—but that gravy train is coming to an ignominious wreck.

    1. "has regressed".

      Your analysis is 100% correct.

    2. 3:55 is entirely right. Read "Capital in the Twenty-First Century" by Thomas Piketty.

  8. http://www.umt.edu/law/CalendarandEvents/newsfeed.php#negotiation-team

    On November 11, 2014, the foul stink pit posted a story labeled “UM School of Law ABA Negotiation Team Finishes First.” Check out this portion:

    “University of Montana School of Law ABA Negotiation Competition Team returned from Seattle University with a First Place finish in the American Bar Association sponsored Law School Regional Negotiation Competition November 7 and 8. Seattle University School of Law hosted this year's event. The region includes law schools from throughout the Northwest and western Canada, with additional entries this year from other Rocky Mountain states and the Midwest.

    UM Team Members Nick VandenBos, [Bozeman, MT] and Lindsay Thane [Missoula, MT], both 2Ls at the University of Montana School of Law, advanced to the final round appearance with the best score out of 24 teams following the opening Friday and Saturday sessions. "Negotiation competition tests preparation as well as a team's ability to react to situations on the fly," said VandenBos. "You prepare for months to be able to improvise - that’s what makes this kind of competition exciting. You learn to trust your partner and read your opponent." Team partner Thane added, “Negotiations has been my most beneficial and rewarding experience in law school both in terms of the practical skills and relationships built as a team. The strength of our team in the way we challenge each other in practice and incorporate the feedback we receive into our approaches.”

    Also competing at this year's event were 3L teammates Samir Aarab, [Oslo, Norway] and Elizabeth Musick [Memphis, TN]. This year's competition marks the final appearance of Aarab and Musick since both students will graduate from UMSL in spring 2015. Making their first appearance as alternates were Kathryn Ore [Missoula, MT] and Dylan Vinzant [Scappoose, OR], both 1Ls.

    Together with team coach Klaus Sitte, the team prepared many long hours, culminating in the two day competition. Sitte serves as Adjunct Faculty at the School of Law, teaching Alternative Dispute Resolution and Negotiations, in addition to coaching the Negotiation Team. He has coached the Law School's Negotiation Teams since 1990, with six previous teams competing at nationals and one international competition appearance. UM Negotiations Teams have placed 2nd and 3rd nationally.”

    In the final analysis, non-legal employers do not give one damn how well you did on these idiotic teams. Hell, law firms and government agencies couldn’t care less. These are meaningless compeTTTiTTTions. Enjoy the first place finish in the regional contest, kids. When you are collecting unemployment, you can reflect fondly on these memories. Unfortunately, they will not put food in your fridge or pay any bills.

    1. These Morons can come first place in some idiotic negotiation ABA sponsored competition and in real life cannot negotiate the price of a used car from a cigar chomping salesman.

  9. According to the Bradley University (Peoria, IL) website, Bradley has partnered with Indiana University's Robert H. McKinney School of Law.
    Bradley will nominate to pre-law or alumni for acceptance at IU's law school.
    If accepted, a student will "receive at least a 50% scholarship for all three years, a paid position as a Research Assistant after completing 30 law school credit hours and designation as a Fellow in their chosen area of study." Bradley University opened a Pre Law Center a few years back.

  10. Wanna practice cow patty law? Decide property line disputes between Farmer Jones and Farmer Wilson? Recover the cost of a dead cow hit by a train? Then come on down to UM Law. Hee-Haw!

  11. Take a look at this garbage descripTTTion:


    “About the University of Montana School of Law

    The University of Montana School of Law offers an alternative to big, urban law schools. Each year, we enroll approximately 84 students from across the country looking for a hands-on approach to legal education. The atmosphere is enhanced by the surrounding Rocky Mountains, where wilderness and recreation offer a break from the rigors of law study.

    Our curriculum is different. Since 1911, our goal has been to prepare competent practicing attorneys. In 1914, The University of Montana School of Law became a member of The Association of American Law Schools and in 1923, the School received accreditation from the American Bar Association. While many law schools emphasize legal theory, we integrate theory with practical experience. Students draft contracts, create corporations, counsel clients, negotiate transactions, try a case to a jury and argue an appeal. Students have the opportunity to do advanced work in environmental and natural resources law, Indian law, trial advocacy, dispute resolution, and business law. You can even pursue joint law and graduate degrees in environmental studies, public administration, and business administration.”

    Yes, people attend law school for the surrounding landscape, right?!?! Who would place employment prospects above the scenery?! Perhaps the morons who go to VermonTTT Law Sewer might be swayed by the chance to wear Birkenstocks while hiking along picturesque, green pathways.

    By the way, Ass-Clown: No one gives a damn if your curriculum is supposedly different from that of other commodes. Applicants and students care about landing decent positions. Law firms and government agencies are concerned with hiring graduates of high-ranked schools. Hell, even non-legal employers don’t want idiots who couldn’t get into a real law school, Lemming.

    1. Yup. No one cares. Most importantly, hiring partners. Their criteria, surprisingly, is all the same. That being: For a local school like this, you'd better be top 5-10% and Law Review.

      Otherwise, be prepared to gaze on the Rocky Mountains close up.. as you may be forced to live a squatter's existence on a part of them. That is, until the authorities decide you're crazy and a nuisance and decide to move you on.

  12. How many fax machines do they have? MIght help them increase their shitty ranking.

  13. Check out the LSN entry on the UniversiTTTy of MonTTTana Sewer of Law:



    The University of Montana School of Law offers an alternative to big, urban law schools. Each year, it enrolls approximately 80 students from across the country looking for a hands-on approach to legal education, where students and faculty work closely inside and outside of class. The atmosphere is enhanced by the surrounding Rocky Mountains, where wilderness and recreation offer a break from the rigors of law study.”

    That’s looks familiar, huh?!?! It’s as though this text was lifted directly from the toilet’s “About” page. You also tend to see this a lot in Wikipedia articles, as well. Of course, when others attempt to provide objective data about individual law schools on that site, such info is usually removed quickly.


    Montana Law School is considered a Somewhat Competitive law school, which accepts only 59% of its applicants. Comparatively, Montana is Significantly Lower than the average cost for law school.”

    Hell, fat chicks home alone on a Friday night have a lower acceptance rate, when it comes to booty calls. It speaks volumes that an ABA-accredited commode can be so easy to get into, yet still be considered “somewhat competitive.”

    Now take a look at the following Class of 2018 data:

    Applications: 325
    Offers: 189 (58.15%)
    Matriculated: 80 (24.6%)

    25th percentile UGPA: 3.01
    Median UGPA: 3.49
    75th percentile UGPA: 3.66

    25th percentile LSAT: 152
    Median LSAT: 154
    75th percentile LSAT: 158”

    Keep in mind that undergraduate course of $tudie$ include tons of soft topics. These figures above include those who majored in Political $cience, History, Philosophy, Literature, etc. Also, at any legitimate U.S. law school, an LSAT score of 158 would be below the 25th percentile of matriculated students.


    Deciding to attend law school requires a large financial investment with the goal of securing employment upon graduation. The University of Montana class of 2013 had an employment rate of 78% with 7% pursuing an additional degree.”

    This is a weak-ass employment “placement” rate. If you want to piss away three years of your life – and incur substantial amounts of NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt in the process – you are still free to do so, Dumbass.

  14. I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don’t know how to cook or clean, don’t want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?

    American women are generally immature, selfish, extremely arrogant and self-centered, mentally unstable, irresponsible, and highly unchaste. The behavior of most American women is utterly disgusting, to say the least.

    This blog is my attempt to explain why I feel American women are inferior to foreign women (non-American women), and why American men should boycott American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women.



  15. I've lied under oath countless times. What am I gonna do? Implicate myself and become part of America's prison-nation over some book of fairy tales. The entire court system is rigged against the average man anyway, so to me, a judge is just some bozo in a robe, a robed peon, a former dirtbag lawyer who was appointed judge on account of political connections.

  16. The need for legal services in MT is pretty low. What more is there to do than prosecute (or defend) low level criminals, family law, and property disputes?

  17. Great site! Here's a link to a report about a known job scam at http://thedevilcorp.wordpress.com/ .

  18. If you're from Montana and you don't mind making $40K a year as a lawyer, this place ain't so bad.

  19. The weird thing about sites like this is that they attribute only ONE path to success. Big law is the only metric you are using as being successful? It's ridiculous bullshit.

  20. Having attended and graduated from this shithole, I have to agree with almost all of this. Don't waste your time with this, or any third-tier law school, unless you've already got a gig dialed in.

    That said, here’s a fun fact. In 2015 the University of Montana School of Law was renamed the “Alexander Blewett III School of Law” in exchange for a $10 million "naming gift." Aside from now having one of the stupidest law school names anywhere, this gives attendees an awesome built-in joke about their unfortunate choice of law school.


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