Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Fourth Tier Trash Pit Valparaiso University Law School Now Offering Buyouts to Tenured Faculty Swine


Tighten Your Belts, Pigs: On February 26, 2016, the Chicago Post-Tribune published a piece from freelance reporter Amy Lavalley, under the headline “VU Law School announces ‘right-sizing’ plan.” Enjoy this beautiful opening:

“Valparaiso University announced Friday that in the wake of declining enrollment for its law school, it is offering buyouts to tenured faculty and faculty members with multi-year contracts.

The school has 21 tenured faculty and six with multi-year contracts and any of them could be eligible for a buyout, said Andrea Lyon, the law school's dean, adding she couldn't comment on a target number for the buyouts because that would depend on salaries and the school's budget. 

She said the school is "right-sizing" its faculty because of a drop in students. The school has an enrollment this year of 430 full- and part-time students, and had an incoming class in the fall of 133 students. 

At its peak, the school had 600 students, she said, and while the number of students at law schools nationwide has been dropping for 40 years, the decline became precipitous with the recession several years ago. The number of students taking the LSAT, a standardized test required for law school admission, has dropped 50 percent nationwide since 2009.

The incoming class at VU hovered around 150 or 160 students for a few years but is now declining, Lyon said.

"For the size we are and are becoming, our faculty is too large and that's why we're doing this," she said, adding the school wants to make sure its students are prepared to succeed and the faculty is doing that.” [Emphasis mine]

You’re welcome, bitches! Scroll down, near the conclusion, for this gem:

“By the end of March, Lyon said administrators should know which faculty members have accepted the buyout and what the school's next step will be. 

"We are very grateful to our faculty who have been here, many of them for 30 years or more," she said, adding the decision to offer the buyouts was not one the school took lightly. "It's not a referendum on any faculty member, or that anybody has done anything wrong. It's a response to the market. My colleagues are wonderful people and I will miss them very much."

Tuition for this school year for full-time students was $39,450, which Lyon said would remain the same for the coming year.” [Emphasis mine]

Perhaps, you greedy pigs should drastically reduce your tuition rates. Of course, that thought never entered your little mind.


Other Coverage: On February 26, 2016, Rob Earnshaw’s article, “VU Law School to offer faculty buyouts,” appeared in the Times of Northwest Indiana. Take a look at the following excerpt:

"Dean of the Law School Andrea Lyon said there are 36 full-time faculty members and the number of buyouts to be offered is still undetermined. Once there is a target number, officials hope the buyout works and the school can be right-sized. 

Lyon said if they don't reach the target number "we'll have to cross that bridge when we come to it." 

Lyon said enrollment in the Law School has been going down and the school's been more selective from a much smaller pool of applicants. She also said legal education has taken quite a hit and people taking the LSAT nationwide has gone down 50 percent from 2009 to now." [Emphasis mine]

Let’s see how selective the commode has been, in it’s admi$$ion$. After all, that’s what the dean of the law school said.


Scraping the Bottom of the Bowl: Reviewing the garbage heap’s 2015 Standard 509 Information Report, you will note the following:

"75th percentile UGPA: 3.27
Median UGPA: 2.93
25th percentile UGPA: 2.63
75th percentile LSAT: 148 
Median LSAT: 145 
25th percentile LSAT: 142" [Emphasis mine]

Hell, I could score higher on the LSAT, if Sofia Vergara was sitting on my lap the entire time. By the way, if this pile of excrement is becoming more selective, who were they admitting before?!?!


Ranking: A law school that charges such outrageous tuition MUST have one hell of a reputation in the legal and academic communities, right?!?! Well, according to US “News” & World Report, Valaparai$o Univer$iTTTTy Law Sewer is rated as a FOURTH TIER DUNG HEAP! What an incredible feat, huh?!?!

Conclusion: Valparaiso “University” Law Sewer is a decrepit toilet that is desperately trying to stay in the game. You can bet your ass that the univerity brass grew tired of no longer relying on this cesspool as a cash cow. Then they see that jackals with JDs, who do not submit articles in peer-reviewed journals, are making MUCH more than men and women armed with PhDs in core disciplines such as math, history, physics, and biology. At least, a smaller pool of applicants and students will result in fewer Valpo Law grads eating Alpo dog food.


  1. In case anyone wonders:
    1. The ABA is an organization designed to assist BigLaw and the law schools, so don't ask why they aren't taking steps to close this TTT and so many others. They never will, because their goal is to protect the rich and the entitled: period. The ABA does not care, at all, about un or under employed new attorneys or about potential victims of the scam. They never have and never will. The best example of this will be when they provisionally accredit Indiana Tech later this year. The last thing Indiana needs is another ABA sanctioned law school-after all, look at Valpo's troubles-but it's going to get one, because that's what the ABA does-takes care of the entitled.
    2. What's going on at Valpo is a hallmark of the scam: adapt! adapt! adapt! The TTTs will do anything to stay open, and the new model will be to have as few tenured faculty as possible, moving to a faculty of all adjuncts-which will then be advertised as producing "practice ready" grads. Even within the scam, some must be sacrificed, and for the TTTs that's tenured(read: expensive) faculty. The deans have got to save their cushy jobs, after all.
    The scammers are more than willing to adapt-just take a look, IT and all the Infilaw schools are still open-so long as the loan conduits apply and the guaranteed loan $$$ flow. The scam will not end until the money does.

  2. Doesn't anyone ever notice, that some of the law grads not able to make a living in law, seem like losers who would fail in life anyways?

    Caste Study:

    Look at the law grad out of California with over $170,000 of law school debt and is now an Uber driver. On welfare and has a few kids and wife to support.

    Just looking at his pictures alone you can tell he would not have been very successful doing anything else.
    Then there is this woman law student on Youtube:

    - Undergrad - Phoenix Online
    - MBA school - Walton University online
    - Law School - Florida Coastal Law

    Over $200k student debt, She works three jobs, clerical position, delivering news papers, and some other odd job. Not very good life choices.

    I personally met a law grad from the university of Miami law, over $180k in student loans, lives with his parents, and tries to hustle people by pretending to be a LSAT tutor via craigslist. (After reading all of the power score books, there is really nothing he can teach you-- so he is exposed). Yeah, he is a loser also.

    You guys need to wake up and see that "DARWISM" is in effect here. The weak will always be behind and never taste the sweet nectar of success.

    I don't want to point the finger, but I will drop a jewel of wisdom...."Partner Up With Someone Stronger Than Yourself"-- your doing it all wrong!!!

    ** No offence the go getters that hustle hard and move mountains!!

    1. I don't know who these people are, but (2) should not have gone to university at all (still less pursued three degrees), and (3) presumably did not get a decent score on the LSAT and therefore has no business teaching others.

      Just a few decades ago, people like (2) would not have gone to university, and they probably wouldn't have graduated if they did. They certainly wouldn't have gone to law school. Nowadays, however, every goddamn buffoon gets at least one degree.

    2. Captain Hruska Carswell, Continuance KingMarch 2, 2016 at 5:46 AM

      What is happening is that the folks you cited as "mopes" are becoming mainstream. The tatted up purple hair foodie APP generation will view Phoenix and "distance" education as the norm. We see this phenomenon is our profession with AVVO. A newbie with a 10 AVVO ranking is now considered, by their generation, skilled, seasoned and a great advocate. It doesn't matter what used to be reality. Society is changing and their are new norms and values. Phoenix and DeVry are good. Everybody has it...it must be ok.

    3. I agree to a large extent. Many of the guys that I know who didn't finish high school and are in the trades and city jobs are killing it. They made not have had books smarts but they figured out that I) too many people were going to college and II) political support wouldn't apply to white collar workers.

      I work add that your analysis doesn't just apply to the most extreme cases. Even if you go to law school or another field and a manage not to be completed destroyed, you still will likely lose. A protected municipal job will give you a larger salary, pension, and guaranteed return account (in NYC, many city employees have the equivalent of a 401k on top of pension, but they get a GUARANTEED 7 plus percent annual return). If you pursue law, even if you have no debt and make a reasonable salary, you still are a loser relatively speaking. There are much better ways to earn a living out there.

      Law school should be a career for the independently wealthy or those who pursue it as a second career. For instance, I was reading about an NYC caprtain in the Post. The city is paying for him to attend NYLS. Even though it's a trashpit, he will retire at 45, collect six figures in pension, and he'll have about a million dollars in his defined return retirement account. In his case, the law degree won't hurt him at all. That's how you
      Win, and yes that is Darwinism works. Idiots that get conned to pursuing private sector careers, unless they are rich or go to elite schools, deserve the pain they get. This is especially true for people that attend trash pits.

    4. I second your opinion.... I bet the AAMPLE kids would give them a run for their money. At least they would be more motivated.

      They need to have the passion for law. Like Eugene Young in "The Practice". He had fire in his belly, and was willing to be a minister of justice for the poor.

      Old Guy, do you concur ?

    5. Speaking of hustling, what was your particular area of law practice again?


    6. @7:20 -- Great point, BUT ....

      There are some of us "losers" that could have realistically done well in other careers, yet we made the mistake of becoming lawyers instead. For example:

      (1) The pre-med weed-out, who chooses law school over becoming a dentist, PA, PhD, teacher or going to an osteopathic medical school. Sure, getting into medical school was no longer an option, but there were other good options that could have worked out well. Note: people with lower grades than him who did go to dental school (also pre-med weed-outs) are now doing quite well.

      (2) the disgruntled PhD in molecular biology who is sick of begging the NIH for funding. Thus, they go to law school to become a patent lawyer. Big mistake, seeing as patent law is now only interested in engineers.

      (3) the engineer who decides to become a patent lawyer. After 5 years, they get laid-off and can no longer find a job.

      (4) the chemistry major who is doing well as a junior chemist. Rather than go for the PhD, they choose law school. Upon graduation, they cannot find a job.

      (5) an analyst who works several year for an international hotel chain. They decide to go to law school, but upon graduation can only find work that pays $50K or less. That's about half of what they made prior to law school.

      ALL of these are true stories of tier 2 graduates that I know, one of which is me. We're all reasonably smart people who deserve better than what we got as lawyers.

    7. Please stop with the trolling.

    8. 1:13 great point. Every one I know at my Tier 2 school is out of law, or never got in the first place outside the top of the class. I had a job as a labor economist for the Federal Government, with great benefits and a salary in the mid five figures. After graduating from law school, unable to get a law related job, I had to start from the very bottom in a small family business. Made one half my prior salary. Not only was law school a complete waste of time, the so called education had no relevance to my future career.

    9. a couple of things:
      7:41a-totally agree that municipal jobs, generally, are a much better bet than LS. HOWEVER these jobs-especially the NYC jobs you mention, are almost impossible to get. You've got to be politically connected; we're not the only ones who recognize what plums these jobs are. And it's important to note that all cities don't pay like NYC. If you've got a city job in Flint or Boise, you're doing just OK.
      8:42-ah Mr. AAMPLE, we missed you-and that FAMU that you love so? Most recent inflated ABA job stats: of a class of 174, only 69 had "JD required" jobs and fully 43 were unemployed. So fewer than 50% had lawyer jobs, and almost 25% were unemployed 9 months after graduation. Included in that number is your hero, Eugene Young; his show was cancelled 12 years ago. He's now a manager at McDonalds; honest work, but that JD isn't much help.

  3. Andrea Lyon a former Solo herself is in a good position to tell the well-paid pampered Prawfs what its really like to get three bills from INNOCENT as the fresh driven snow criminal defendants. She knows it means to "hustle" and still be a lower middle class attorney. Why? Because schools like Valpo were accredited and over saturated the market.

  4. The greedy pigs will kick and scream and refuse.

    I doubt there will be anyone smart enough to take the buyout.

    I've heard of people taking buyouts from Lehman and Bear Sterns some months before their collapse, but the vast majority refused.

    Perhaps this will be the first law school closing.

    1. Captain Hruska Carswell, Continuance KingMarch 2, 2016 at 5:53 AM

      Law Schools will never close. The last one closed in the 1950s. There are hundreds of law schools all in some way politically connected to the community. Valpo is a great example. Andrea Lyon is a legal LION herself. A tremendous death penalty lawyer. She has influence. When she "picks up the phone" people will listen. Folks will keep this school open. Multiply that by hundreds among the Rank Not Published schools...even Cooley and Marshall have "juice."

    2. The good captain is correct. All of these trash pits have some level of local juice-yes, these dozens and dozens of TTTs and TTTTs-and will never close. As long as the loans flow...it will take the feds completely shutting the $$$ off, as the scammers will continue to adapt.

  5. Stonemason, Esq.March 1, 2016 at 3:49 PM

    According to the last number I saw, their median LSAT is 149. Potential clients of Valpo graduates would get equally good results by submitting their legal questions to drunken hobos.

  6. The Glock-packing bunny hunter has quit. (The university president at Mount St. Mary's.)

    There are so many things wrong with what he said, where does one begin?

  7. Those muddy, filthy, fornicating swine!

    They don't deserve a penny in buyouts. Just take them in a van to the food stamp office.

  8. Let's not forget Nando's prior takedown of Valpo from 2010. The more things didn't change, the more they stayed the same (and, in fact, got worse).


  9. IF the bottom ranked 50% of 2nd tier toilets have no chance, where does that leave the watermark for Third and Fourth tier dumps? Hell, even Tier 1 trap school grads are struggling.

  10. Remember the time Nando beat the fuck out of that shitty law skool? That was funny?

  11. http://lawschooltruthcenter.blogspot.com/2016/02/valpo-reformers-endangering-appropriate.html

    The Law School Truth Center covered this development in an epic February 27, 2016 entry entitled “Valpo Reformers Endangering Appropriate Legal Market Saturation.” Take a look at this portion:

    “Just a few years ago, we built a brand spanking new spaceport for rocketing million-dollar careers in Fort Wayne, Indiana. You might know it as Indiana Tech. Before they built it, they did a peer-reviewed feasibility study upholding the highest in scientific and statistical virtue that showed, very clearly, that the state of Indiana was facing a dire lawyer shortage and had an unmet demand for legal education. The rational conclusion, based on all the available science, was to build another law school.

    Now, Valparaiso - a mere 100 miles away - is downsizing its law school.

    Facing a sharp decline in student applications and enrollment at its law school, Valparaiso University is offering tenured faculty and those with multi-year contracts a buyout.
    [Spokesperson Nicole] Niemi said the purpose of the buyouts is to align the size of the faculty with the expected future law school enrollment.

    I understand I'm normally fully supportive of how America's accredited law schools teach the next generation of white-collar juris-heroes how to kick injustice in the dickhole. But good God, what a confused message.

    Contrary to the reasoned analysis of Indiana Tech's study, Valparaiso's decision smacks of knee-jerk irrationality that essentially caved in to short-sighted thinking. We know what the future holds for the legal profession, and it's a tidal wave of Baby Boomer Barrister's dying and retiring, falling like dominoes that jeopardize the Rule of Law in North America, leaving rural areas functioning with only 1 lawyer to every 0.6 actual, lawyer-able legal issues, a ratio of great peril for the genetic fiber of our society's judicial branch.

    Departing from this truth because you want to save a few dimes here and there is not only reckless, but "right-sizing" sends the wrong message to students: that there's somehow lessdemand for lawyers despite our expanding population and increasing justice gap.”

    This an excellent use of humor. Sometimes, you can only laugh at the law school pigs and cockroaches. It’s not as though the academic thieves will change their conduct to anything resembling honor or decency. Hell, if they could use federal tax dollars to enroll tackling dummies in their TTT programs, they would do so in a heartbeat. In the end, these “educators” do not have one ounce of integrity.

  12. http://abovethelaw.com/2016/02/law-school-offers-buyouts-to-tenured-faculty-thanks-to-sharp-decline-in-enrollment/

    On February 29, 2016, Staci Zaretsky posted an ATL entry that was labeled "Law School Offers Buyouts To Tenured Faculty Thanks To Sharp Decline In Enrollment." Look at her conclusion:

    "In an email sent to the school’s alumni, Dean Lyon elaborated on why the decision to offer buyouts was made (the full text of her email is available on the next page):

    Law schools in today’s post-recession era are facing a sharp decline in student applications and enrollment and are confronted with a diverse mix of financial challenges due to these issues. Valparaiso University’s Law School is no exception.

    To put the Law School and our students in the best position to succeed, we are taking steps to meet the challenges facing legal education. Based on thorough due diligence, we have made the difficult but necessary decision to allow tenured faculty members and faculty members with multi-year contracts to request a buyout of their contracts based on certain terms and conditions.

    The purpose is to align the size of the faculty with the expected future law school enrollment.

    Valpo Law’s administration will know which faculty members have accepted the buyouts by the end of the month. Dean Lyon had this to say to the Post-Tribune: “It’s not a referendum on any faculty member, or that anybody has done anything wrong. It’s a response to the market.” In the meantime, another thing the school may wish to adjust in response to the market is its career counseling program — only half of the class of 2014 was employed in full-time, long-term jobs which required bar passage.

    Best of luck to Valparaiso Law professors who accept these buyouts. Look at it this way: It’s certainly a better alternative for students who would otherwise have suffered through higher tuition payments to fund your six-figure salaries."

    While the law school pigs will squeal about how this is a terrible development, you will not see these bitches and hags express similar concern for the HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of law grads in this country who face garbage job prospects and are drowning in NON-DISCHARGEABLE debt. That speaks volumes about their lack of character. To them, YOU, the student, prospective applicant, or recent law school graduate, are mere collateral damage.

  13. VU just announced they are closing the law school


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